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Good morning ladies and gentlemen of the CSFMB. It’s Friday, and it’s time to vote for some douchebags. Last week’s winners were Bullies/Cyberbullies and Katherine Brotherton, who had set some dogs on fire. Crazy.
This week we’ve got:
Singer Erykah Badu: Nominated by jimmypasta for creating a music video where she strips completely nude and acts out a fatal gunshot wound as she walks past the point in the street where John F. Kennedy was shot. Sure it’s a bit insensitive and weird but it involves female nudity so it must be art. Or you’re gay or something. Anyhow, is making a mockery of a national tragedy worthy of a DBOTW win? You must vote.
Cardinal Fans: Nominated by RFDC, prince of tolerance, for bragging about winning on opening day while the Cubs lost on opening day. If RFDC were a fan of anything, it might be the Cubs, and thus he should be quite familiar with the premature championship celebration. It’s sports. And it’s rivalries, and these things are as integral to baseball as sticking a needle in your ass, but it is a shot at Cardinals Fans, who are extremely meatbally and rude and obnoxious. So vote for them!
People at the Easter egg hunt I was at: Psycory took the family to an Easter Egg hunt. Some of the parents pretty much found all the eggs and redistributed them to their children, which lef Psycory to suggest limitations on total easter egg receipts. See, when you spread the eggs around, it’s good for everybody. Every fuckin body. So if you’re into socialized Easter Eggs, vote here (until they TAKE your vote!)
Subway: Look, bacon is what it is. A nectar of the gods.It’s salty and yummy. One thing it is not, is pepperoni. Look pepperoni is pepperoni and bacon is bacon unless it’s those goddamn bacon bits that never ever were any type of bacon ever. Anyway, Bagels is peeved because Subway claims that the substantially cheaper pepperoni is the new bacon. Is he right?
City of Chicago: hackwilson’s ribbies’ new girlfriend doesn’t drive, and she lives in the City, meaning that hack’s got to take his truck out there every time he goes to see her. But there’s no where within city limits that he can park his B-Plated pickup without getting ticketed or towed. Hack has certainly gotten himself a looker, and he wants to keep her but the city is bleeding him dry. And that’s supposed to be his woman’s job. Are they douchebags or what?
Tiki Barber: Beardown nominated him for bailing on his pregnant wife for another woman. Some one the board think it’s a simple matter of time before he bails on her for another man. I don’t know where all the gay rumors come from, what is it his big smile? His manscaped eyebrows? His preference for cock? What’s that all about?
Hatians in Jamica: This summary might have been written differently a few weeks ago. I’ve decided to turn over a new leaf with Elmhurst Steve. It’s possible that he’s misunderstood, a poor unfortunate victim of CSFMB hyperbole and lynch mob mentality. Anyway, Steve nominated predominately black people who lost everything they’ve ever owned and face a decimated country, government, and economy and are fleeing the unsafe conditions in Haiti caused by malnutrition, disease, lack of proper shelter and medical care. Vote for them if you want to.
Milton Bradley: Nominated by shirtless driver for flipping off the fans. I want to go to the Sox game next weekend so I can make a “Wilting Badley” sign for him. I think he’d like it. It’s probably racist though so maybe I better not be the only guy ever in the Cell with a racist comment.
KC Johnson – Bulls Tribune Writer: spmack nominated KC Johnson for his failure to report the Bulls biggest story of the year so far. There seems to have been some kind of physical altercation between VDN and Pax in Vinny’s office. This kind of event should certainly have been broken as it happened rather than sat on to protect a lame duck coach and possibly a lame duck team president. KC is kind of a dwerk anyway. That’s part dork, part dweeb, and part jerk.
Cubs Bullpen: entr0py has seen enough. Many of us have. Just under two weeks into the season and already the bullpen looks inexperienced and bad. Smarj whatever is awful. Grabow, awful. That guy who had “forearm issues” and got DL’d, awful. The whole damn lot of em. And Zambrano is pitching poorly, still “cramping” up… and the pitching coach is never looked at? Weird.
Well lads, these are your nominees this week. Go vote!
_________________ "Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014 bigfan wrote: Many that is true, but an incomplete statement.
Last edited by Darkside on Fri Apr 16, 2010 10:16 am, edited 1 time in total.
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I guess I missed the Badu thread. What's up with you lately, Jimmy?
