I used to be the computer guy at a library. Despite having to serve the whole library, politics dictated that I was stationed in the Youth Services dept (the head of the library evidently had an affair with the old head of the library when the job was created. notch. I never met the guy but his legendary quote regarding the circulation department was that "a trained dog could do that job" =)
There was a kid named Sean who was your prototypical latchkey kid who would come over everyday after he got off of school and spend a few hours here waiting for his mom to get off of work. Since he was there every day he used to spend his 2hrs in the computer lab, and he learned to get there quick before other kids could get the computers before him. Runescape was "in" amongst the kids, it was basically an early MMORPG played over flash/web/site/whatever and Sean had all kinds of crazy experience and items and, you know, he fucking LOVED IT when kids would hang out in awe of his mundane videogame achievements.
Welp as time went on he got more and more comfortable with us, and when we were kind of like "hey sean..." when he started printing out 30-50 pages worth of internet stuff per day (there wasn't even a "suggested donation" thingy for printers back then) he decided to start fucking around with us by doing things like, say, stealing all of the mouseballs from our PAC (public access catalogue) comptuers. It got to the point where my boss had to buy like 30 super-cheap mouses and then glue the latches on the bottom, which made it a real pain in the ass when the lint and dirt would build up on the rollers... essentially we had to turn those cheap mouses into disposable ones.
Eventually his attitude and "fuck these guys"ishness got to the point where something had to be done. I BackOrificed the shit out of the comptuers in the lab (
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Back_Orifice) and had the keyloggers running full steam just waiting for dipshit to take the bait. Aside from the fun ability to remotely close programs and pop up dialog boxes with custom messages ("Uh, I'm getting messages from God on my computer" me: "I think you're going to have to see a priest about that one. Tell you what we get slow on friday nights so I'll schedule an exorcism then") the paydirt was finding out his password for RuneScape, which we've established to be his sense of pride and admiration amongst the younger kids who looked up to his high levels, gold, and items. The password, btw, was "dbzrulesass"
So I bided my time waiting for a day when there were a bunch of kids in the lab and then I dropped the hammer: I killed his browser process, popped on mine logged in as him and locked him out of his account, and then proceeded to start dropping all of his items and gold and everything I could do to terrorize his account. To stall him I sent a job to all of the printers in the lab to start spitting out ~50 pages each of a cheat sheet with all of his online information / passwords, including the revelation that his runescape password was "dbzrulesass" and the younger kids grabbed a sheet and started laughing and he was all NOOOOO and running back and forth trying to grab all of the copies flying out of the printers before anyone else could see them.
When he eventually came to me he was in tears.... what the hell is this!??! I had changed his pw back to "dbzrulesass" and, as he demanded answers, I just kind of pseudo-enigmatically said "don't steal our mouseballs." He ran outside vowing revenge and whatnot.
From that point on, he learned some respect and he never would fuck with our mouseballs or display his famous attitude again. He was just another kid in the lab, and I think eventually he must have gotten the keys to go straight home after school cuz he stopped coming in. C'est la vie.
_________________
Curious Hair wrote:
Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?