Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Killer V · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 8:10 am

24_Guy wrote:

Since I'm never going to watch the show, how is it exactly that having a perfect memory helps this cop, anyway? It's not like she's clairvoyant. I mean, she still would have to coincidentally always be at the scene of the crime, for her memory to be of any use.

Dumb de dumb dumb.

Yeah. A cop who takes good notes wouldn't be as titillating of a show though.

And doesn't she basically need other cops to form a hypothesis, then she recalls the scene and either confirms or denies it? She's basically a computer with tits (AWESOME).

Jbi11s · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 8:34 am

Whata state of generosity. Look what my agent got for me...

Krazy Ivan · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:22 am

W_Z wrote:

more like you overestimated yourself...

Everytime I hear this one I think "Wow, that guy is a real jag." Is that supposed to make me want to watch this horrible show.

newper · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:25 am

SomeGuy wrote:

Jbi11s wrote:

getting insurance questions answered helps me to relaaaaax...

Who the fuck is this social parasite making late night calls to an insurance company for consoling?

And why is he drinking his triple mocha latte at 10pm?

I believe it is a large americano mochaccino machiato.

Ugueth Will Shiv You · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:33 am

I like my insurance like me burrito.

Jbi11s · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:35 am

Ugueth Will Shiv You wrote:

I like my insurance like me burrito.

I like my insurance like I like my burrito, with everything rolled into one...

Shoot me now...

The Original Kid Cairo · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:53 am

Yes. I have a love/hate thing with the State Farm jingles. They're really annoying, but they're catchy as fuck. My kid loves em too. Those marketing folks know what they're doing...

The Original Kid Cairo · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:55 am

SHARK wrote:

Hank Scorpio wrote:

"We forgot the hammock.... I mean halibut"

I can understand the premise American Express is driving at, Hank, but these radio commercials are borderline annoying.

"Borderline" annoying? No, these are the worst commercials on the radio.

Hank Scorpio · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 10:37 am

Jbi11s wrote:

Whata state of generosity. Look what my agent got for me...

...Like a pet baboon with one robotic arm.

Tad Queasy · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 1:18 pm

Odd choice of music for the Haggar Life Khaki spots that Silvy does.

Krazy Ivan · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 1:18 pm

Tad Queasy wrote:

Odd choice of music for the Haggar Life Khaki spots that Silvy does.

Really gay, if I remember correctly...

Tad Queasy · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 1:24 pm

It doesn't really fit the copy/product, which is I guess what they want, and it's sort of...spastic and disorienting. At least Silvy is able to get everyone at AM1000 free pants.

sjboyd0137 · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 1:25 pm

viewtopic.php?f=21&t=64966

redskingreg · **Posted:** Thu Dec 01, 2011 4:25 pm

You sure you weren't at Bella's Pizzeria?

JUST SHUT UP!!!

24_Guy · **Joined:** Mon Sep 26, 2005 7:43 pm **Posts:** 1678

redskingreg wrote:

You sure you weren't at Bella's Pizzeria?

JUST SHUT UP!!!

I know, I love that part. The ol' "just shut up!" defense when you're caught off guard in your lie. Always a guarantee to convince any jury.

MattInTheCrown · **Posted:** Mon Dec 05, 2011 7:09 pm

Really, there's no need to get specific: every last one of those CBS commercials the Score plays incessantly on the webcast is an abomination. Whoever is in charge of doing the ads for them should be thrown from a tall building.

That said: "On Sundays!!!, I wear a jersey with someone else's naaaaame on it." I stop the stream every time that commercial comes on, but sometimes I'm not near the radio, and it puts me in a bad mood for like an hour.

24_Guy · **Joined:** Mon Sep 26, 2005 7:43 pm **Posts:** 1678

Thank God women are fully educated on the topic of prostate exams, and are well-versed in the topics of the various conditions and treatments related to the prostate. As a Neanderthal, I'm just utterly confused by such things. I just stick to science fiction movies. Me good at them!

I won't even bother wasting my wife's time on educatin' me on this. I'm sure she'll set up any appointments I need (which better not interfere with my science fiction movie watching), talk to my doctors for me (but, I'll talk the nurses! get it?!?! ha ha!!), determine any course of action I need to take, and remind me of my treatment schedules and take me where I need to go. Hey, maybe someone can make a science fiction movie out of all this!

Oh, cool thing happened the other day, while my wife was doing our finances (of which I am too obtuse to understand... math, yuck). She named me Vice President of Points! So cool! I can't wait to tell all my man friends, as soon as they're done watching their science fiction movies.

Killer V · **Posted:** Wed Dec 07, 2011 6:49 am

Why is it that only female, valley-girl lawyers are allowed to talk about penis pills on the radio?

Uh, yah, I'm like a lawyer here to talk about your penis or something.

redskingreg · **Posted:** Wed Dec 07, 2011 2:03 pm

I know you count the minutes until you can escape from your hum-drum lives, so you can hear how exciting mine is.

Big Chicagoan · **Posted:** Wed Dec 07, 2011 2:04 pm

Killer V wrote:

Why is it that only female, valley-girl lawyers are allowed to talk about penis pills on the radio?

Uh, yah, I'm like a lawyer here to talk about your penis or something.

Because they are the type of chicks who do guys who take penis pills.

SHARK · **Posted:** Wed Dec 07, 2011 2:10 pm

It's bad enough Progressive Insurance has the unfunny Flo. Now, they've added a new series of spots with "The Messenger" paying people's gas, parking meters, etc.

24_Guy · **Joined:** Mon Sep 26, 2005 7:43 pm **Posts:** 1678

Big Chicagoan wrote:

Killer V wrote:

Why is it that only female, valley-girl lawyers are allowed to talk about penis pills on the radio?

Uh, yah, I'm like a lawyer here to talk about your penis or something.

Because they are the type of chicks who do guys who take penis pills.

And, would it be acceptable for a man to read a commercial encouraging women to get breast enhancement? "hey girls, I've seen the results, you've got to get this!"

Mm hmm.....

Big Chicagoan · **Posted:** Wed Dec 07, 2011 6:18 pm

24_Guy wrote:

Big Chicagoan wrote:

Killer V wrote:

Why is it that only female, valley-girl lawyers are allowed to talk about penis pills on the radio?

Uh, yah, I'm like a lawyer here to talk about your penis or something.

Because they are the type of chicks who do guys who take penis pills.

And, would it be acceptable for a man to read a commercial encouraging women to get breast enhancement? "hey girls, I've seen the results, you've got to get this!"

Mm hmm.....

Yup. Pretty much.

W_Z · **Posted:** Sun Dec 11, 2011 12:22 am

I'd like to introduce you to Jim and Dave. Two sales managers who work for, presumably, rival ad companies. They don't know each other that much except that they live in the same overpriced, cookie cutter, sickly suburban neighborhood and they both drive infiniti cars.

they talk to chuck on a regular basis, making sure that they are millionaires who do NOT feel like hundredthousandaires. and they get into trivial snowball fights from time to time.

i'm glad that they are part of the vaunted 1% that we all strive to be a part of. good for them.

but you know what?

i don't really fucking care about them. fuck you, infiniti. shut. the. fuck. up. about. them. already.

MattInTheCrown · **Posted:** Wed Dec 14, 2011 11:24 pm

The Original Kid Cairo wrote:

Yes. I have a love/hate thing with the State Farm jingles. They're really annoying, but they're catchy as fuck. My kid loves em too. Those marketing folks know what they're doing...

I was undecided for a while on these, but damnit, I think I actually love them. First of all, I noticed that every last one of them is catchy to the point that I find myself randomly recalling them even when I'm not listening to the radio. The first one I had to admit to liking was the amusing "I like my insurance like I like my burrito" one; that Mexican folk style is great. Recently, I've come to love the "state of inundation" spot for seriously genius lyrics:

"I'm in a state of inundation, from the endless iteration, of discounts that State farm gives to me; good driver and good student, muti-car and all the rest, make up a veritable litany."

A state of inundation? An endless iteration? A veritable litany? Come on, that's amusingly-clever shit right there. It's also pretty clever how all of them work in "state of" themes. That's just a damn crafty job by that ad agency. And you all know what I generally think about advertisers.

newper · **Posted:** Thu Dec 15, 2011 1:02 am

MattInTheCrown wrote:

The Original Kid Cairo wrote:

Yes. I have a love/hate thing with the State Farm jingles. They're really annoying, but they're catchy as fuck. My kid loves em too. Those marketing folks know what they're doing...

I was undecided for a while on these, but damnit, I think I actually love them. First of all, I noticed that every last one of them is catchy to the point that I find myself randomly recalling them even when I'm not listening to the radio. The first one I had to admit to liking was the amusing "I like my insurance like I like my burrito" one; that Mexican folk style is great. Recently, I've come to love the "state of inundation" spot for seriously genius lyrics:

"I'm in a state of inundation, from the endless iteration, of discounts that State farm gives to me; good driver and good student, muti-car and all the rest, make up a veritable litany."

A state of inundation? An endless iteration? A veritable litany? Come on, that's amusingly-clever shit right there. It's also pretty clever how all of them work in "state of" themes. That's just a damn crafty job by that ad agency. And you all know what I generally think about advertisers.

They've got a list of discounts longer than my arm, get to a better state, State Farm.

I'm in a state of caffination,
got all my fingers shakin'
must have been that large americano mochachino macchiato
now the family's gone to bed
and thats my favorite time to get some tips on better rates
cause my State Farm guy answers late
and even when its not my agent
someone's standin' by so patient
gettin' coverage questions answered helps me to relax.
Get to a better state State Farm.

I'm in a state of generosity
Look what my agent got for me
Just by switching to State Farm
A few hundred unexpected bucks
I couldn't ask for more
but now I've got to figure out
what I should use it for
A new bike would be radical
but maybe something practical
like a pet baboon with one robotic arm
Get to a better state, State Farm.

Krazy Ivan · **Posted:** Fri Dec 16, 2011 10:44 am

Who at the Red Cross thought Nick Cannon is the ideal spokesperson for anything?

The Original Kid Cairo · **Posted:** Fri Dec 16, 2011 10:56 am

Krazy Ivan wrote:

Who at the Red Cross thought Nick Cannon is the ideal spokesperson for anything?

Yeah, that's a bad thing there. Guy sounds high as fuck.

redskingreg · **Posted:** Fri Dec 16, 2011 11:07 am

Krazy Ivan wrote:

Who at the Red Cross thought Nick Cannon is the ideal spokesperson for anything?

Daddy, Nick Cannon is hil-air-ious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xfMgHTMOlY

Krazy Ivan · **Posted:** Fri Dec 16, 2011 11:08 am

redskingreg wrote:

Krazy Ivan wrote:

Who at the Red Cross thought Nick Cannon is the ideal spokesperson for anything?

I told you, dad. Nick Cannon is hil-air-ious.

I loved that episode...

Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

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