CSFMBWA World Title Match Original Kid Cairo(c) vs. Terry Speeps
CSFMBWA Tag Team Title Match The Grand Score(c) vs. Douchebag and Woodridge Ryan
CSFMBWA Intercontinental Title Match Jackref(c) w/Houston Homer vs. Hank Scorpio
CSFMBWA InterWebs Title Match Krazy Ivan(c) vs. Phil McCracken
Celebrity Intergender Tag Match Sinicalypse and Alexa Chung vs. Keeping Score and Taylor Swift
Loser Becomes a Sox Fan Match RFDC vs. JimmyPasta
Drinky Alliance Grudge Match Boyd vs. Drop In

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Um doesn't a champ usually get a rematch when he loses a belt?

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I figured you'd want revenge against that dastardly Jimmy Pasta for injuring you and costing you the strap.

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So after I mop the floor with him and make him a Sox fan then I get a rematch with Krazy Ivan?

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Wait til next Friday.

Maybe something will happen....

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

And I, you.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

I'm gonna have to do some research into who Alexa is to write that match.

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Which past Champion am I jobbing to this time? I"m the ONE MAN BAND baby!

Wow. Booking yourself in the World Title Match? This is like then President Nixon calling a play for the Washington Redskins, complete with a 13 yard loss.

I hope OKC oversells every move you make just to humiliate you.

Agreed. Screw you booker man!!

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Complete creative control.

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The CSFMBWA would like to wish SomeGuy well in his future endeavors.

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Does Ugie have anything to do with this anymore or is all Speeps?

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

He's like the Crocketts after Turner bought WCW.

He's the figurehead.

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Good point. I agree you are taking this down the same path as WCW.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I was loathe to make that comparison for fear of some asshole saying just that.

But I'm glad you were that asshole.

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It's not amazing a guy like RFDC is blaming booking on his lack of success. I'm not really a fan of anyone. At least I'm not crying like I just watched Marley and Me. Are those tears or tinkle on your hands? By the way, if The Crew needs assistance this week, I might be available.

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Never underestimate my ability to be an asshole.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

All this talk of assholes is getting Keeping Score horny.

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You will be Jack Swaggered soon enough.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

If you mean doing push-ups to Rage Against the Machine, that started at 7:09 AM this morning. If you mean a losing streak, keep dreaming. Perhaps the fumes that emulate from the streets of St. Louis have clouded your already weak judgement. Don't test all of this.....you won't enjoy the outcome.

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Coming from the guy who is booked in the only worse match on the card than mine. You better get Speeps back up on that rooftop.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

All this bitching about booking could lead to someone being involved in a feud with Panther.

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Hank is about to get spanked. No one beats the Intercontinental champ with Houston at my side. I'll make it quick though so you can get back to Indiana and sip on some Bud Light Limes. Possibly the only thing worse than drinking water from Gary Indiana. At least smell from Gary will cover up the scent of your shame when I send you back there broken and broke.

*burp*

#DrinkyAlliance

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Careful. That man has a side part.

The CSFMBWA World Heavyweight Championship. The premier sports message board championship in the world.

For nearly a year, I have been thinking about being the champion. For nearly a year, I have passed out with the dream of being the standard bearer for this industry. Even with all of the success I've had, that thought has never strayed too far from my mind. No matter how much I tried to drown it in Tito's, the thought of being World Champion wouldn't go away. But Boyd was the man and the #DrinkyAlliance was in control of the championship, so I waited. I teamed with someone I considered a friend and we dominated the tag team division like no one else ever has!

But then something changed. Then came the Rumbel. Here was a chance of a lifetime! The opportunity to fight for the World Heavyweight Championship. I took that opportunity and I beat off every other man in that ring and I became the number one contender for the title!

Drop In and Bobby Heenan tried to take my spot. They tried to jump to the front of the line. And what happened to them? What happened when they tried to deny me of something I've been thinking about for a year?! They were dealt with!

And so that brings us full circle. Back to Kid Cairo. Back to the man that destroyed my dream. Kid Cairo, without a shadow of a doubt you've been a great champion. You have survived and thrived despite the best efforts of the #DrinkyAlliance. But I will beat you next week.

Kid Cairo, you denied me once and cost me my dream. Now, I will be your worst nightmare.

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I'd like to say I didn't see this coming. But I did. Members of the #DrinkyAlliance getting delusions of grandeur. First Speeps and I, the greatest tag team in the history of Internet Wrestling, decide to challenge each other. Not just the greatest in the CSFMBWA, the greatest ever.

Now, I find myself battling the former CSFMBWA World Champion. My former #DrinkyAlliance friend and brother. He's managed to hit levels I don't think Boyd thought he could reach. He's turned that title into a proposal to a woman out of his league. To the amazement of the millions, AND MILLIONS, she said yes. Congrats. Just remember, I helped you keep that title for a long time. My time has come. More importantly, our time has come.

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