Okay, in honor of the Games of the XXX Olympiad, I'm going to share a heartwarming story of Olympic Dreams.

This goof I went to high school with named Yaro Dachniwsky always dreamed of being an athlete. Unfortunately, he was short and pudgy and not particularly athletic. But he tried his fucking balls off. I guess I should also mention that Yaro was one of the biggest jerkoffs you'd be likely to meet. I haven't seen him in 30 years, but my money would be on him being a jerkoff to this very day.

Anyway, we played on the soccer team together. This was well before suburban programs became ubiquitous. Our team was loaded with immigrants and the sons of immigrants. Everybody grew up playing for German, Polish, or Mexican club teams. We almost never lost. Nobody in the Chicago area could touch us. Now, the Granite City teams, that was a different story and a story for another day.

Yaro was pretty universally disliked on our team. Plus he really couldn't play. He tried to become a goalkeeper, but there were at least three guys he was never going to beat out. Eventually he quit the team. He also tried playing tennis but he wasn't very good at that. But somehow, some way, this persistent, persevering motherfucker fashioned a career for himself as a keeper in the Major Indoor Soccer League.

But Yaro's real dream was to be an Olympian. He certainly wasn't going to be able to do it in soccer. He just wasn't good enough. Also, by the time Atlanta '96 rolled around this guy was getting kind of old. But one day I picked up the newspaper and saw a list of local Olympians. Yaro had made the team as the third-string goalie for the team handball squad.

Hold onto your dreams, kids.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1996 ... ill-battle

Well I'll be damned.

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Sounds like maybe he was a little better than you thought

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

DO you think third team handball goalies pull all kinds of ass in the olympic village?

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i bet you could sit down and drink beer with JORR for three hours and not have to say 10 words total.

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

He wasn't 6'3", 185 in high school either. And I'd still take Tommy Breason, Peter Dickenscheid, or any one of the Ganshirt brothers in goal before Yaro.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

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"CBS Evening News" anchor Scott Pelley gave his viewers warning last night that he'd reveal Olympic results because he said it was news. ABC News' "Nightline" anchor and former Chicagoan Bill Weir wouldn't reveal NBC by name the other night...

http://www.mediabistro.com/tvnewser/sco ... ed_b140300

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

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Team Cutler.

Comcast has a special 3D channel that is broadcasting random olympic events all day. It's nice because they show many of the events that NBC doesn't even pay attention to. The only problem is that since it is a 3D telecast, the picture is split, so you see the same shots on the left and right side of your screen. It would be nice if Comcast offered a standard broadcast of this same station.

Also, thumbs up to the Chinese Trampoline competitor named Dong Dong.

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I don't know about you guys, but I always recall past summer olympics being heavy on track and field. I have watched significant coverage, and it has mainly been volleyball, gymnastics and swimming. I got some track yesterday, but I remarked that I haven't even seen a high jump contest yet, and they have skimped over the non-running events. They did the entire female triple jump medal round in 1 minute. I always thought the summer olympics was anchored by track and field....

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Hawaii (fuck) You

I think the track and field events didn't start until this past weekend.

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

Shit, I can do this dive.

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The Pentathlon is on right now.

Someone wake Panther.

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I thought I had tuned in to the Special Olympics earlier today.

Turns out, it was just women's basketball.

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1926-1931-1934-1942-1944-1946-1964-1967-1982-2006-2011

Booooo

US up one going into the 4th.

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Been watching the closing ceremonies for about 20 minutes because I need to make myself feel worse apparently .... it's quite the cacophony of caca .... if you're sick in the head like me, http://misclivetv.blogspot.com/p/olympics-2012.html

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Do we get the Doctor Who-Mary Poppins death match here?

How about the Jamie Oliver-Gordon Ramsey egg beatoff?

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Actually, I just happened across this ... what I watched seems to match up to some degree with what it says, so it's likely legit.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Do these come with soup?

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

A better stream ... http://www.vipbox.tv/watch/66568/1/olympics---closing-ceremony-live-stream-online.html

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

the spice girls sucked a big one! the olympics are ruined

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

Turned on the closing ceremonies for about 10 mins.

Bad. Real bad.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I want to do really nasty things to Sporty

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When I am stuck and need to figure something out I always remember the Immortal words of Socrates when he said:"I just drank what?"

How do you go through the entire Opening and Closing Ceremonies with absolutely no mention of The Rolling Stones?

They did extensive stuff with The Beatles, The Who, Queen, a tribute to David Bowie, and performances from 29 other bands that nobody's ever heard of and nothing with the greatest Rock N' Roll band of all time?

That's a real Mick-tease. I just assumed they were holding out with no mention whatsoever to close out everything with The Stones. That sucked. Take That? Really?

Come to think of it, nothing from Elton John either? Are these organizers really British?

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You know me like that.

The closing ceremonies were just a total clusterfuck of bizarre shit. I don't know why the hell I watched for as long as I did.

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