OK,
So during the unplugged hour D-Mac shared the story of his autistic son "discovering" himself, and now requiring some professional coaching on the appropriate times to "pleasure" himself.
I open it up to the board.
What is the most inappropriate time you rubbed one out?

I have two that come to mind.

1) Once at a party where I slept overnight, I felt the urge, and upon completing the deed had to deposit the result into a fishtank.

2) On a family driving vacation, in the back of the van when everyone else was sleeping (except the driver). I had to wear that one for a few hours.

Light'em up.

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“Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend - fudge.”

Spaulding?
I'll sit back and wait for my answer.

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We all have private ails. The troublemakers are they who need public cures for their private ails.- Eric Hoffer

At my desk at work. I was working on a special project and it was after-hours before the cleaning people came in.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Mustang, never a work jerk?

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

No,
Never at the office.
Catholic guilt I guess.

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“Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend - fudge.”

While driving non-stop (other than for fuel) home from Houston when I was 19. Missouri never was so interesting. Without cruise control, it posed quite a challenge maintaining a consistent speed. 70....40....60...40... Tough multi-tasking. Yes, I was alone.

Mustang Rob wrote: 1) Once at a party where I slept overnight, I felt the urge, and upon completing the deed had to deposit the result into a fishtank.

Fresh water or salt water? Any fatalities?

But the fishtank is guilt free?

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

On stage at a Neil Diamond concert.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

I've jerked off during the MJH show. I think it was during the almanac segment.

Try getting thru the show today without thinking about that Mac.

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"NEED a friend...Buy a dog"..

I once worked in this office with around 15 women and there was a back men's bathroom no one ever used but me. It was a nice place for a quick nap or a little rum tum tugger about one of the ladies in the office.

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Back off, Warchild. Seriously.

It was about about a 100 gallon fresh water.
No fatalities that I know of, but a probable filter replacement.


Hey, it's selective guilt.
Anyway, I was young.

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“Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend - fudge.”

I have little to add. I seem to have a little more self control than you guys and that activity is not for me (could be my Catholic guilt). I'm not quite a double bagger so I had been fortunate to find willing participants fairly easily. Some of them could have used directions or a map and I could have done better myself. I do like fooling around in fairly public places -that's my source of impropriety.

Hot. Scuse me.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Now you're just torturing Reason



Mac,
Stick or automatic ?

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“Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend - fudge.”

i was so nearly compelled to call in when Mac was talking about this.

everything he said i lived through with my brother. down to him jumping out of a boat at 20 knots...


in traffic on the edens many moons ago.

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@audioidkid

Whenever I hear women say stuff like that it just brings a tear to my eye. I always find myself thinking, "Dammit, I could've saved the day!"

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

So you consider yourself the Mighty Mouse of female climaxes?

Yeah.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Driving Home From A Construction Job Durring Summer Break From College.... i was falling asleap and thought it seemed like a win win way to stay awake....

family vacation, i was in the back of the van and i had just learned what it was......

bathroom at a girlfriends grandmas funeral..... i was taking a dump, and i didnt want to go back out to the terrible wake, suddenly something came up while thinking about what me and the GF had done the night before...... im very ashamed of it....

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- Formerly Known As "Chicago Storm"
- I know Brian Bauer

When I was in college I worked at a car dealership where I had to hike cars to Toledo OH. I tossed out MANY soiled McDonalds napkins on I-80.

I brought my girlfriend a couple times but those are stories for a different thread.

At mid-morning and/or mid-afternoon I often snap off a wrist shot at work. You don't want that stuff backin' up to your brain stem.

Did you guys read about the Wheaton High School student that felt compelled to share in the salad dressing at school? I'm sure it had a little extra ZING to it...

SEVERAL links

The "work jerk" is good for when one is distracted and needs to regain focus. I miss having an office -- can't quite close the door in a cube.

I'm usually the first one to band practice... got our fair share of naughty mags there (they help relax guys when its time for recording)... every once in a while I'll rub one out before the crew gets there...

Some of you guys need to ask Mac for the # of the professional coach.

i would just like to add my $.02 if I may.



"under-doug"

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@audioidkid

what a cool guy

this is how wheaton gets into the papers...

I especially love the part about the container being washed out and re-used.

WHAT!?!?!?!?!

You can't afford another frikin' container? Nobody in the school has a problem using this thing? Wow....

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This is my signature...

I think it was re-used because they didn't know that the douche had jereked off in it until late the next day.

It began as fresh water and ended up as salt water



Sounds like we'll see Reason's story soon...

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Northwestern University engineering library during an intense study session. It's best not to try to think of something else when an impure thought pops into your mind. Take care of the problem immediately and then get back to work.