I can't see youtube at work but is that the family guy cutaway scene with the black ladies all talking sasst?


And Kid, I agree with you.

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My invisible friend named Mary Jo is going to drive me insane. Both of those Progressive songs are killing me.

Plus, they play them at a higher volume so I have to turn them down so people outside my office don't think I'm cranking Flo tunes.

Go to hell, Progressive.

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You know me like that.

I actually found them funny for a while. After 349 times, it gets a little old...

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This is my signature...

Yeah, I was OK with them the first 30 or 40 times. But, then, by Day 2, they were getting old.

Now, I'm putting away sharp objects.

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You know me like that.

I agree. I have a really sharp letter opener and refused to take the easy way out and put
8 staples in my temple. Unfortunately it didn't kill me, but did give me a big enough headache
to ignore the commercial and most of Mully and Hanley. That commercial is the worst.

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Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami

Has anyone complained about the double stack combo commercial yet? That woman's singing is really awful.

I know what you're referring. My dad really likes Wendy's, but since founder Dave Thomas passed away many years ago, their commercials have been lacking.

My dad likes turtles.

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-- source

The candy? Good stuff...

Yes. Bad vocals, and cheap quality sound. I don't think they put a lot into actually trying to make it sound good. Spiegel's parody songs are more well done than this one.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Yeah, I bitched about that one on August 6th. It's so awful, I wondered yesterday whether maybe there's some sort of inside joke going on. They can't be serious with that effort.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Posted June 14.

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

I've never listened to the whole thing and didn't even realize it was a Love Shack parody. I heard it on the way to work this morning, listened to the whole thing, and now I hate it even more. The original song was annoying and this is actually worse.

Pretty much any State Farm ad makes me want to stab the nearest elk.

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-- source

You probably look really good in corduroy pants...

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This is my signature...

Crunch nut cereal.

Anti-Semite.

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The commercials for TLCs shows make me want to kill.

I haven't heard the John Cicco's Menswear commercials for awhile but started hearing them again over the last few days. I forgot how massively fucking annoying they are. Those women singing are every bit as awful as the Kars-4-Kids commercials.

I don't even change the station when the SportClips commercial with Harry and his son come on, but I can't PTFB fast enough when a John Cicco commercial starts.

Instead of B-I-N-G-O, those John Cicco commercials that air on ESPN Radio 1000 have the Cicco women singing it to the melody of C-I-C-C-O.

Women: "C-I-C-C-O. C-I-C-C-O. C-I-C-C-O. John Cicco's is our name-o." Lame-o indeed!

I keep forgetting to bitch about that Mountain Dew commercial with Dale Earnhardt Jr. God is that awful. Everything about it is terrible: the premise, the continuity, the sound effects, and most of all Earnhardt's awful acting. So, wait, he trades his stock car, which he inexplicably drove to a retail store, for a Dew? Not a ride in the car, but the car itself. Yet he asks for it back. And not only does he get it back, he gets it back after like a 5 second ride. Fucking stupid.

As for Earnhardt, has he ever talked with other humans? Seemingly not, because he can't act his way through a couple of simple lines without sounding like an alien from outer space. Cheeeerist. I understand that many athletes/celebrities/drivers of fast cars are shitty actors, but this man really raises the bar on the shitty-acting front.

Mountain Dew should have scrambled the brains of this baby with a coathanger when it was in the fetal stages.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

I touched on this commercial a few pages back. It's beyond awful.

Also, saw a commercial this a.m. for douche wipes. Basically they're like Clorox wipes, but for your vagina. Is douche wipe the new douche bag?

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-- source

The stupid broad that plays the clerk is just as annoying. "Ah, um, in the cooler over there." YOU MEAN THE PLACE WHERE DRINKS ARE IN EVERY FUCKING STORE!?! I don't know what's worse, stupid cracker for asking, or the stupid bitch for having to think about it.

Also, the "Honey I'm.....Whoa! Where am I?" commercial needs to die. It seems like it's been playing for 5 years. Yet another annoying commercial featuring the dumbass husband and the oh so clever wife. Fuck off!!!

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

I love how they have to have an even deeper south sounding voice on the commercial so Dale doesn't sound inbred.

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

Not only that, it's also another iteration of the 'cutesy-couple' meme. And fuck, but do both of those actors talk with excessive vocal inflection. (On a side-note, I believe all people who speak with excessive inflection should be rounded up and made available for human hunting like Ice T in that one movie.) That stupid bitch saying "yeeeap" forty times is just insufferable. Also, she hits an ear-shattering octave as says "technically." Fuck those stupid cutesy fucks and their stupid play-aggressive banter; may they both contract ass-cancer and die.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Failure on that front.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

This was my rant (as seen on page 18):

Hey, Dale Jr., you fucktard, you really don't know where the Diet Mountain Dew is located? You're at some sort of god damn convenience store or gas station. Is it really that fucking hard to find the coolers full of hundreds upon hundreds of bottled soft drinks? No, you just waltz in and belt out "Where's the Diet Mountain Dew!?!?!" Take two fucking seconds and look before you open your rednecked, dead-dad mouth.

/rant over

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-- source

It was a setup for the "last Dew" scenario; without his saying that, you wouldn't know that he's browsing drinks. Its similar with the annoying footfall sound and the gulping sound also featured in the commercial.

The moral of the story is: if your radio commercial's scenario requires idiotic dialogue and irritating sound effects, it's best to just ditch that scenario in favor of one that doesn't.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Try to write a spot where the husband has all the answers and the wife is a bumbling dipshit. It's harder than you think.


I agree with this. However, I can suspend my disbelief because some slack-jawed cracker walking into a bait shop or whatever and immediately just bellowing out "whurr's duh dot mound doo?" isn't altogether implausible.

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Fuck Jeremiah Weed and that gibberish that Billy Gibbons is mumbling!!!

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken