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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 7:07 pm 
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SHAKE THAT is back. The RealVolution continues with Dear Leader back in the throne ready to enable us to COLON DO WHAT WE WANT. This isn't a radio show, it's a movement. We've had our NBC SNF style intros.... we've got an A-Team, and Laurence didn't have to spend all day worrying about hurting DURR SPEAGOL's feelings. This show should be a cracker (irony duly noted).

CHANNEL 5 REFERENCE 5MINS INTO THE SHOW. ARIZONA REFERENCE. If anyone's playing BINGO THAT with me tonight you're gonna get a buzz. We've got a special friday night #ASKHERB segment from 9-9:30, and OMFG IT'S HATER WEDNESDAY.... even though it's friday. Oh yeah, I'm willing to risk being racially misinterpreted and say that tonight's show is gonna be a proper cracker.

Don't let T.S. Peeps lead you into perdition, let Laurence lead you to the promised land.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 7:39 pm 
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Hell yeah, we're getting the 25th update on the awesomeness that was the One Step poker tournament. That's one thing I love about the Score: when something HUGE like this goes down, the next day it's like you were right there with 'em because all of the hosts/producers KNOW that we want to hear all about their lives off the air. Jolly good show.

Speaking of, Laurence is an underrated voice of hockey wisdom on the score, nevermind the quick transition to illini talk. Last night you didn't have to be miserable, which ushers in Illinois' new slogan for its basketball program; Illinois Basketball: YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE MISERABLE ALL OF THE TIME

This is why Laurence has his fingers on THE PULSE of the Chicago sports universe: he knows that nobody wants to talk about those 9-0-2 Blackhawks, that's why he tapered this last caller's thunder off in under 30 seconds before teasing us with the forthcoming Illini guest. He's gotta get us worked up into a fever pitch b4 tonight's PEOPLE'S HOUR COLON WE DO WHAT WE WANT, which tonight is asking herb about what he's hating on for #HATER ASK HERBSDAY.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:00 pm 
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You take this shit and you get it the fuck outta' here, understand?


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:03 pm 
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SomeGuy wrote:
You take this shit and you get it the fuck outta' here, understand?


Did you forget to take your meds today or something? You're some kind of serious and combative today... methinks you need to crack a cold one and settle down with a nice spirited game of BINGO THAT tonight. Don't do it for me, do it for the children.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:07 pm 
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sinicalypse wrote:
SomeGuy wrote:
You take this shit and you get it the fuck outta' here, understand?


Did you forget to take your meds today or something? You're some kind of serious and combative today... methinks you need to crack a cold one and settle down with a nice spirited game of BINGO THAT tonight. Don't do it for me, do it for the children.


The only thing I hate more than children is you!!!!


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:07 pm 
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Laurence doesn't like storming the court; he thinks it's dangerous and unnecessary. That must be why he decided to do PBP for DePaul, as there is a 0.0% risk of any courts getting stormed in a game where DePaul is involved, Mr. Blutarsky.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:13 pm 
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SomeGuy wrote:
The only thing I hate more than children is you!!!!


OK then, we're obviously going to have to fight over this one. My address is 242 Front Street, McHenry IL 60050. Phone # 847-879-3278. Here I've even taken the liberty to draw up a google map for you.

I'd get over here real soon, cuz playing the BINGO THAT drinking game is bound to get me all kinds of drunk and sloppy, and I know that you wouldn't want to face me at anything short of my best.

This message is typed out in the spirit of riding in an elevator with Laurence Holmes; you're quite uncomfortable cuz you know that not only HE'LL HIT YOU, but when he's done he'll hit your girlfriend too. And then your sister and mother and even grandmother to prove a point. In under a year you'll be triply related to Laurence W Holmes, Sex Machine.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:14 pm 
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sinicalypse wrote:
SomeGuy wrote:
The only thing I hate more than children is you!!!!


OK then, we're obviously going to have to fight over this one. My address is 242 Front Street, McHenry IL 60050. Phone # 847-879-3278. Here I've even taken the liberty to draw up a google map for you.

I'd get over here real soon, cuz playing the BINGO THAT drinking game is bound to get me all kinds of drunk and sloppy, and I know that you wouldn't want to face me at anything short of my best.

This message is typed out in the spirit of riding in an elevator with Laurence Holmes; you're quite uncomfortable cuz you know that not only HE'LL HIT YOU, but when he's done he'll hit your girlfriend too. And then your sister and mother and even grandmother to prove a point. In under a year you'll be triply related to Laurence W Holmes, Sex Machine.


:lol:

Well Done!


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:22 pm 
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"You gotta find a way to bring all the HOT GIRLS to the game.......that'll bring all the boys." - Laurence W Holmes, procreation major / communications minor.

Seriously, if you're a hot 19 year old female co-ed nothing spells EXCITEMENT like getting on a shuttle bus with a bunch of happening guys and going out to scenic #Rosemont IL to see a team on a current 6-75 type tear in Big East conference play. Maybe you can tell 'em that they can see future European B-League talent while they're still stateside?

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:23 pm 
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Wait, hold the fucking phone, are you really listening to Larry's Show?

Holy shit, you're fucked up!


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:24 pm 
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BREAKING: Laurence Holmes considering attending a DePaul game this season. Tune in to 670 The Score for more. Reply NOBRK to opt-out.

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Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:29 pm 
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KS: Laurence just declared that this is "Flair Country" as in Ric "Wooing Fool" Fleihr. Are you gonna let him get away with that? This is 100% bonafide CP Munk territory. Someone's gotta make a HEEL TURN and inform Laurence of the obvious, for once.

Until then, we're basking in the glow of anti-court-storming talk from a DePaul fan who hasn't had to deal with a court storming in his adult lifestyle. Heavy doses of #Herb as we talk college buckets leading up to PARTYTIME at 9pm. ¡Viva el RealVoluccìon!

Edit: I meant "adult lifetime" but, no doubt, Laurence leads an adult lifestyle too. He takes pictures with so many lucky ladies you know he keeps a love sponge handy.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:49 pm 
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HELL YEAH! LAURENCE IS REPLAYING SPEAGOL-TAINTED INTERVIEWS WITH JEFF "MICKEY" MANTO AND JED "YES MY PARENTS ACTUALLY NAMED ME JED" HOYER. ¡VIVA EL REALVOLUTION!

I know I'm posting by myself tonight, but I'm still having a ball. Its not like all the bars are closing at 10pm; there's plenty of time to get my dose of realness and then go strike out with 4s in Logan Square. When you're listening to Laurence you'll never walk alone, big red fans!

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 8:58 pm 
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I'm afraid to sleep tonight because after reading this thread....all I see is:

Image


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:07 pm 
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sinicalypse wrote:
Laurence doesn't like storming the court; he thinks it's dangerous and unnecessary. That must be why he decided to do PBP for DePaul, as there is a 0.0% risk of any courts getting stormed in a game where DePaul is involved, Mr. Blutarsky.

:lol: :lol: :lol: Sini don't take this the wrong way but you are a lot more entertaining to read when you keep it to a few sentences.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:15 pm 
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Keeping Score wrote:
sinicalypse wrote:
KS: Laurence just declared that this is "Flair Country" as in Ric "Wooing Fool" Fleihr. Are you gonna let him get away with that? This is 100% bonafide CP Munk territory. Someone's gotta make a HEEL TURN and inform Laurence of the obvious, for once.

Until then, we're basking in the glow of anti-court-storming talk from a DePaul fan who hasn't had to deal with a court storming in his adult lifestyle. Heavy doses of #Herb as we talk college buckets leading up to PARTYTIME at 9pm. ¡Viva el RealVoluccìon!

Edit: I meant "adult lifetime" but, no doubt, Laurence leads an adult lifestyle too. He takes pictures with so many lucky ladies you know he keeps a love sponge handy.


The wrestling guys here would know a whole lot better than me, but it's certainly not Flair country in my opinion. He was never even really around this area except for his WWE days, was he?

It's Punk's world here nowadays. When I was growing up, I'd say it was Dick The Bruiser's and The Crusher's. Not sure who it belonged to in between that considerable gap.


Chicago was third in Flair/Horsemen countries in the mid to late 80's behind Charlotte and Minneapolis.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:22 pm 
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312-644-6767, Speeps. I just added "Speeps" to my phone's dictionary so autocorrect doesn't turn you to "Sleeps" when I type your name in my phone. You're kind of a big deal over here, so I think the only logical step is to get in line behind the logjam of calls that were accrued during the last ~30mins of interview rehashes.

You are the hero that Chicago needs/deserves. Call Laurence and set him straighter than a ReVolution thread. I worked your name into a call with Les that one night: you owe me!

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:33 pm 
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OH HELL YEAH, is Laurence gonna play a Beckham interview? No? WHAT A TEASE!

Instead Jeff is on the score and he's gonna tell us what he wants to learn. That's right kids, the tried and true syntax of [CALLER] is on the Score and wants to talk about [SUBJECT] is back. It worked for Steve Dahl and, heh heh, I think he knows a little more about radio than you..... podcasting from his basement taxing his loyal fans for $$$ just like supermasochist Bob Flanagan retorts when asked why he does zany things like nail his dick to a board 13 times over -- "because [he] can"

Randazzler just had a SHARK moment correcting Laurence re: Hendry's last prospect. There was even an "Uh, " in there. Hell yeah.

"Terry's Peeps is on the Score and he wants to talk about.... Sex baby, let's talk about you and me"

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:43 pm 
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Yeah, I've been a fan of the Dazzletron since I first heard him. I think his talents are best suited to national broadcasts cuz he's got the voice, the cadence, the intelligence, and the transcendentalism that is inherent to a national sports talker. He also actively looks for good/intelligent/thoughtful texts to read as opposed to the HURR DURR LOOK AT TGESE DUMBASS MEATBALLS schtick that's FOTSing it up from 1-6.

I made a thread about him in the "Other" forum the night of his first solo broadcast, but it got buried and I've seen 1-2 similar/lesser threads made about him since. Don't believe the Johnny Come-Latelies, your boy sir talkstoomuch was on this from night one.

Enjoy Dazzlepalooza while it lasts cuz if he's any good at calling games he's gonna end up with a MLB gig someday, or he'll at least get national fill-in-duty that goes alongside a weekend/substitute-host gig on a national sports talk network with rights to sporadic MLB games.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:45 pm 
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Keeping Score wrote:
Terry's Peeps wrote:
Keeping Score wrote:
sinicalypse wrote:
KS: Laurence just declared that this is "Flair Country" as in Ric "Wooing Fool" Fleihr. Are you gonna let him get away with that? This is 100% bonafide CP Munk territory. Someone's gotta make a HEEL TURN and inform Laurence of the obvious, for once.

Until then, we're basking in the glow of anti-court-storming talk from a DePaul fan who hasn't had to deal with a court storming in his adult lifestyle. Heavy doses of #Herb as we talk college buckets leading up to PARTYTIME at 9pm. ¡Viva el RealVoluccìon!

Edit: I meant "adult lifetime" but, no doubt, Laurence leads an adult lifestyle too. He takes pictures with so many lucky ladies you know he keeps a love sponge handy.


The wrestling guys here would know a whole lot better than me, but it's certainly not Flair country in my opinion. He was never even really around this area except for his WWE days, was he?

It's Punk's world here nowadays. When I was growing up, I'd say it was Dick The Bruiser's and The Crusher's. Not sure who it belonged to in between that considerable gap.


Chicago was third in Flair/Horsemen countries in the mid to late 80's behind Charlotte and Minneapolis.


Seriously? I don't even remember much about him back then. I would've thought that Chicago, but most definitely Minneapolis would've been taken by the AWA.

He's originally from Minnesota, so that's why he's big there.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 9:53 pm 
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I love how Laurence quickly points out that he knows it's Friday every time he mentions that it's Hater Wednesday time tonight. He must get SHARK type texts all "Uh, Laurence..."

So yeah THE PEOPLE'S LIFE COACH is locked and loaded for ~10mins from now. Laurence is WSOXing it up re: Beckham cuz if you don't think Beckham belongs well then have we got Sept '12 stats for you. Adam Dunn? You don't look at him through the prism you view other players with. He got on base 36.8% of the time last year. Oh yeah, he hit 41 home runs.

Laurence wants to see Alexei Ramirez do better next year. I want a pony for my birthday. The Easter Bunny has our backs, for sure.

Ant ways I gotta stop typing cuz Laurence is reading off a bunch of stats to the point of loss of all context. New cubs fan caller sullies favor w/LoHo by blasting the anti-beckham caller. He even said that Laurence could outhit Schierholtz; cue stories about Laurence's storied baseball career. Ask Marty mcfly: this is heavy.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:07 pm 
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BREAKING: Laurence Holmes is heading to Arizona tomorrow; vacationing for a week in anticipation of spring training. Tune in to 670 The Score for more. Reply NOBRK to opt-out.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:10 pm 
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WHOA! A TEXT FROM PATRICK MANNELLY FOR #ASKHERB!

Man, I swear that with tonight's references of Channel 5, Arizona, Laurence's athletic career, IRL friends with Bears Players, and countless other tropes we've got a BINGO THAT tonight.

Seeing as this is Laurence's only proper 6-10 show after a week of vacation and BEFORE a week of vacation, we're definitely getting three weeks worth of show crammed into 4hrs. His yellow pad is probably kicking back with a cigarette cuz it just ejaculated tonight.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:13 pm 
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If you got A Lot To Do With Race and Comic Books, you've got bingo.

EDIT: or Mentoring Producers and Women Of Chicago Media

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:25 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
If you got A Lot To Do With Race and Comic Books, you've got bingo.

EDIT: or Mentoring Producers and Women Of Chicago Media


ooooh.... shit, i had to PTFB during the middle of his first segment as it was unlistenable, and since then i've spaced out some and maybe missed a combined 1-2 segments. this show has really flown by.... i'm unsure if a woman of chicago media got mentioned early on when he said he was working channel 5, and even tho there's been a lot of talk with herb it's been illini-centric and now it's tailspinned into ask herb.

you can easily cheat the bingo card and call up for the ass-end of ask herb and/or hater wednesday and say something comicky/racial and complete the bingo. bonus points if you mention that you're trying to get a bingo as a preface to your call, cuz even tho there's no way he'll formally acknowledge it, you know that laurence will know what you're talking about. i'd be amazed if someone at the station didn't print that out and hang it up somewhere in the office, much to laurence's chagrin.

i hope you ride elevators alone, CH. seriously whenever you get in one close those doors right quick. you might get hit otherwise =D

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:26 pm 
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COMIC BOOKS! not in detail, but they just got mentioned.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:29 pm 
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ok, so we just need a mention of race in the last 32 minutes to get a BINGO THAT. i'm thinking this pizza delivery man conversation has potential because we could easily delve into racial issues in terms of what kind of delivery service you get in what kind of area, which is due to race.

fuck.... should i call in and hate on people who hate white rappers because we're white and it's all about racism which is not good? oh shit, now that i said this i'd never get through cuz this board is read in teh evenings.... once i made a post mentioning i was on hold with goff and i'll be damned if they didn't leave me on hold for ~45 mins til i just hung up =D

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:31 pm 
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sinicalypse wrote:
COMIC BOOKS! not in detail, but they just got mentioned.


Lance Briggs loves comics. It's a whole new world of entertainment...SHAKE THAT!

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:35 pm 
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OK who is the brave soul who can call in and get Laurence to talk about race? Sure he's prolly done it and we haven't noticed, but with his quick mention of comic books we're in line for a top row bingo if we can get laurence to talk about race!!!! check out the card:
Image

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2013 10:42 pm 
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COMEON SOMEONE! WE'RE ONE MINI DIATRIBE ABOUT RACE AWAY FROM BINGO! CALLING IN IS CHEATING AND I WANT BINGO!

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