Hoody footie pj's, big fucking Vermont teddy bear, chocalate strawberries, roses, and Lover's Lane all need to go the fuck away. I fucking loathe Valentine's Day!

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

I'm getting sick of the commercial with the 70s looking guys ordering the chicken pot pie from KFC.

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To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

I know this thread is for commercials that make me want to kill, but I had to give props to the Honda President's Day spot with the Washington and Lincoln singing. That shit cracks me up:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Osd8Zx3tQlI

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

I really want that brat in the visit Florida.com ad to be repeatedly stung by jellyfish. Way worse than the kars4kids commercial. Every time the kid pauses you think it's over, BUT NOOOOOOOOOO! It starts up again!

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

I don't think it's a kid. Sounds like an adult with the recording sped up, or some trick on autotune, something like that. It's bad. Real real bad.

The commercials/reads don't bother me, but a Velveeta Breakfast Biscuit sounds like something you'd give your dog. It doesn't sound like people food.

Good call. Also, whoever wrote the dialog should have their genitals mutilated.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Holy shit this commercial is driving me insane. The commercial fucks with my CBS player and loops like 3/4 times in a row. Fuck you Hyundai and CBS.

There's a radio spot running over here for Anytime Fitness or some such place, where the woman jumps into the vehicle and rushes the man to take off, because she just scammed them out of a $10 per month membership. Selfish bitch even says the guy that signed her up will probably lose his job over it- great spokesperson for your company, twatwads, a person who knows she is stealing from you and takes measures to avoid detection. Of course, the hook to the ad is she left her purse there while signing up. Right, because you could really make good use of that gym membership by NEVER GOING BACK!

No, he's just a dumbass. You don't have to trick a little kid to steal his shit. He starts talking shit, you take him out.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

So, these terrible commercials are...back.

Back a-gain.

I would have loved to hear that commercial last week back-to-back with the commercial for the news station that was promoting their story on people worrying they have crazy diseases they couldn't possibly have.

It's Me, Ankylosing Spondylitis is like the useless half-brother of Allstate Mayhem. You know, more than anything you really just have to find a good agent.

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HARD HITTING QUESTIONS.




Are you involved. In brokering. A negotiation.




For a gambling bill.










For a casino.

Maybe someone said this... maybe it was me I don't know but the Bob Rohrman "outtakes" commercial makes me want to punch a kitten.
What an ass. Just shots of him cracking up for some unknown reason, and the "silly" music like the shit they'd play during baseball blooper reels during rain delays.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

FLO has a new singing commercial out. Pull the plug already on this makeup/lipstick crusted Caller Bob!

I'll listen to 5 straight hours of flo on tape before hearing one more 30 second University of Phoenix commercial.

Those commercials have music in the background that invariably reminds me of Cake's "symphony in C," when subsequently gets that song stuck in my head all fucking day long.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

"After I get these varicose veins removed, I won't have to wear long pants in July anymore!"

Erm, having surgery on your legs won't suddenly make them sexy. Please continue to wear the long pants, for everyone's sakes. Thank you.

Chef Lorena Garcia in bitch mode over the quality of steak is getting old....very old.

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That's my purse! I don't know you!

Good God we still have another week of these JR roast commercials. It seems like they've been promoting it for 6 months. And I hate The Departed for making that Dropkick Murphy's song ubiquitous.

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

Yeah, and we haven't heard from the "Man of the Hour" himself, Jeremy Roenick, before his big night.

Right on, man, that song fucking blows. Hated it the first time I heard it, and it's only gotten worse after thousands of repetitions.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

NO! MORE FLAAAAAAAAAAAVOR!

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-- source

John Corbett Walgreen's commercials. Fuck you.

Are you at the corner of having the folksy voice of an inbred yokel and being professionally known for portraying Carrie's pussy ex on Sex and the City?

Fuck you, fuckface.

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Back off, Warchild. Seriously.

OK, there's one commercial on television that's really been getting to me. It's a massively in-rotation AT&T commercial where they have some suited shithead sitting in a circle with kids asking a rather broad philosophical question: if it's better to have less or more. this prompts some little girl with some sort of speech development issue to prattle on all incoherently about how it's better to have more because there's more and more is better because it's MORE GODDAMMIT IT'S M-O-R-E MORE I'M JUST SAYIN.... #ROSEMONT

I fucking loathe her voice. It sends waves of unadulterated 30seconds hate down my spine and makes me swell up with disdain for the human condition. If I wanted to come off some sort of anti-establishment cool I reckon I could go on about how the commercial is a microcosm of the inherent flaws of today's consumer society insomuchas the commercial is trying to dually reach out to kids and adults and establish that a neverending bender of MORE AND MORE AND MORE is better, but like.... her voice is just.... STOP. NOW. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Obviously, I don't have kids of my own so I reckon that pushing a decade removed from working in the kids dept of a library I'm de-conditioned to accepting the inherent speech-related-flaws of developing youth, but still, it's just that this damn commercial seems to show up in EVERY. FUCKING. COMMERCIAL. BLOCK. of not just sports programs but all kinds of "primetime" stuff that you can't escape it. Without fail one of the first ~2-3 commercials is this omnipresent AT&T detail and even if you're not paying attention this [r-word-ed.... sigh] little girl is just meandering again and again and again and seriously, for the love of god, ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT. GO GROW UP AND MAKE LOVE TO THE POLE FOR A LIVING. SHOMER SHABBOS. * pounds table *

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I would love to violently remove the vocal chords of the guy in the Tax Debt Relief Center spot.

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-- source

I'd like to lick the back of my hand and backhand that Breath Savers motherfucker into unconsciousness!!!

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

Good one. I already nominated those fart-ass ads a few pages ago, and I'm happy to do it again.

Corner this, you jagmeyer.

There are 2 radio commercials that start the same. One of them is a promo for CBS Radio helping needy schoolkids and the other is an ad for Lee Lumber. BOTH start the same with what sounds like someone taking a bite out of an apple, a bell ringing and then a lady saying "Thank you!" after the bell rings. Both commercials have been in heavy rotation lately on The SCORE.