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Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

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Curious Hair

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 12:35 pm

Joined: Thu Nov 16, 2006 6:29 pm
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MattInTheCrown wrote:

What the fuck is with the "guys are always told to stop scratching" commercial/read?

This one doesn't actually piss me off much, but what the fuck are they talking about? I don't know about you all, but I'm not told not to scratch. Like, ever. The only thing I associate with being told not to scratch is having chicken pox or maybe mosquito bites as a child. Is this a thing? Are guys routinely told not to scratch and somehow I've just missed it? And if not, what the fuck is with this commercial? Who came up with it, and why?

He means don't touch your balls in public.

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Phil McCracken

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 12:36 pm

Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:08 am
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Curious Hair wrote:

MattInTheCrown wrote:

He means don't touch your balls in public.

Well that's just bad advice then

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MattInTheCrown

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 1:41 pm

Joined: Wed Mar 15, 2006 5:35 pm
Posts: 6248
Location: Crown Point, Indiana (obviously)

Curious Hair wrote:

MattInTheCrown wrote:

He means don't touch your balls in public.

I don't know. It specifically mentions "at the dinner table." The dinner table is an ideal place to scratch one's balls, or hell, even play a little pocket pool, as the table obstructs the view of one's crotchal region. So the shit still don't make no sense.

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The Original Kid Cairo

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 1:51 pm

Joined: Thu Apr 06, 2006 12:38 pm
Posts: 39560
Location: Barfagloggle, Indiana
pizza_Place: Pizza Hut

MattInTheCrown wrote:

Curious Hair wrote:

MattInTheCrown wrote:

He means don't touch your balls in public.

The table is awesome for that. Also, movie theatres, my desk at work, the train...ain't nothin like it.

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Dallas Winston

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 3:56 pm

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Okay this LASIK plus commercial is slowly shredding my last nerve. The bad, stilted acting. The GREAT QUESTION response (who the fuck does this!), and the way the milquetoast asswipe broaches his question. He..y...Susan... I'm always expecting his next words to be "Have you..ever seen a grown man..naked. Make it die!!!

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Curious Hair

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 4:03 pm

Joined: Thu Nov 16, 2006 6:29 pm
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Dallas Winston wrote:

Oh god, it's on the Merlin stations (Loop/i101) all the damn time, too.

THAT IS A GREAT QUESTION I'M GLAD YOU ASKED ME FOR MORE PERTINENT INFORMATION ABOUT DOCTORS AYMOND AND HORN

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Mini Ditka

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 4:23 pm

Joined: Wed Oct 11, 2006 2:55 pm
Posts: 3392

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azB-n0vqFLM

Bad Foot Loose parody commercial. The guy is running out like he's John Cougar Mellencamp.

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MattInTheCrown

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 8:31 am

Joined: Wed Mar 15, 2006 5:35 pm
Posts: 6248
Location: Crown Point, Indiana (obviously)

Dallas Winston wrote:

"Have you considered lasik?"

"Yyyes! You can!"

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Tad Queasy

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 8:44 am

Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:50 am
Posts: 11237
Location: Schaumburg
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Why do the Walmart commercials have to emphasize they are talking to "real" Chicago housewives? That makes is sound kind of porn-y. Or are they playing on the "Real Housewives of ______" tv shows?

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SHARK

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:26 pm

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:55 pm
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Location: Lurking Below the Surface...
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Tad Queasy wrote:

Why do the Walmart commercials have to emphasize they are talking to "real" Chicago housewives? That makes is sound kind of porn-y. Or are they playing on the "Real Housewives of ______" tv shows?

It's not just Chicago. Walmart has done similar commercials on a national level, too.

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Krazy Ivan

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:38 pm

Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2006 1:42 pm
Posts: 29260
Location: Parts Unknown
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Tad Queasy wrote:

Why do the Walmart commercials have to emphasize they are talking to "real" Chicago housewives? That makes is sound kind of porn-y. Or are they playing on the "Real Housewives of ______" tv shows?

The Real Housewives of Walmart may be entertaining...

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The Original Kid Cairo

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:40 pm

Joined: Thu Apr 06, 2006 12:38 pm
Posts: 39560
Location: Barfagloggle, Indiana
pizza_Place: Pizza Hut

Speaking of housewives...

The lady from the Luna commercial with the two screaming kids...I'm torn on how to feel about her. The "50% off the noise" joke is pretty hokey and I don't really care for her face, but she does have a nice body in a "middle-aged woman who works out" kinda way.

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Bagels

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:01 pm

Joined: Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:10 pm
Posts: 32067
pizza_Place: Milano's

I seriously think this commercial only airs on NBA TV, but it's on like every single commercial break

the Stonedine cookware....the guy has an annoying british accent..."this new Stonedine pan is by far the best steak pan i have ever used"
"now the reason I toss gravel into the Stonedine pan is to emphasize that not all non-stick cookware is created equal"

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Tad Queasy

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 9:11 pm

Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:50 am
Posts: 11237
Location: Schaumburg
pizza_Place: Palermo's

SHARK wrote:

Tad Queasy wrote:

Why do the Walmart commercials have to emphasize they are talking to "real" Chicago housewives? That makes is sound kind of porn-y. Or are they playing on the "Real Housewives of ______" tv shows?

It's not just Chicago. Walmart has done similar commercials on a national level, too.

You mean a multinational corporation like Walmart advertises outside of Chicago? WOW!

Thanks for another useless post.

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newper

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 15, 2013 10:12 pm

Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2007 11:52 pm
Posts: 12558
Location: Ex-Naperville, Ex-Homewood, Now Tinley Park
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I may have bitched about this before, but I am more than happy to turn downloads into downtime. What I don't need is to hear the commercial every hour.

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Psycory

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Sat Mar 16, 2013 7:51 am

Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2006 1:03 pm
Posts: 4328
Location: Lake Wynonah, PA
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A friend of mine did one of those walmart commercials in North Carolina.

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Urlacher's missing neck

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Sat Mar 16, 2013 8:56 am

Joined: Tue Feb 17, 2009 2:18 pm
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Location: Rizzo fo Shizzo
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On the live stream the commercials are awful and mostly consist of fucking flo and lorena garcia....but you can mute them and stop the suffering......................except for this Rachel Ray unmutable commercial. WTF?? I do not approve of this technology.

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Curious Hair

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Sat Mar 16, 2013 10:04 am

Joined: Thu Nov 16, 2006 6:29 pm
Posts: 55836
pizza_Place: Barstool One Bite Frozen

Bagels wrote:

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Molly Lambert wrote:

The future holds the possibility to be great or terrible, and since it has not yet occurred it remains simultaneously both.

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Dave In Champaign

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Sun Mar 17, 2013 6:15 pm

Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:55 pm
Posts: 3287
pizza_Place: Olde Silver Tavern, Manalapan, NJ [R.I.P.?]

There's a Sam Adams commercial that runs roughly 350 times a day, and it's scored by a song with the lyrics "I am overwhelmed by you." It's just so perfect, because the Masshole bros that apparently work at Sam Adams are exactly the kind of people who'd be overwhelmed by themselves.

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Dallas Winston

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 6:44 pm

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The only fucking thing I want inside that Wendy's inner guy fuckstick is a load of AIDS infected jizz!

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Dallas Winston

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 6:46 pm

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And we're probably real close to hearing Scott from Scott's scream FEED YOUR LAWN! Ad nauseaum! SUCK MY COCK!

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The Original Kid Cairo

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 7:37 pm

Joined: Thu Apr 06, 2006 12:38 pm
Posts: 39560
Location: Barfagloggle, Indiana
pizza_Place: Pizza Hut

Dallas Winston wrote:

Wendy's

Annoying woman.

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MattInTheCrown

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 9:39 am

Joined: Wed Mar 15, 2006 5:35 pm
Posts: 6248
Location: Crown Point, Indiana (obviously)

She sounds so fucking smug in the radio spots. They need one where the other person just slaps her repeatedly for the last 15 seconds.

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SHARK

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 12:38 pm

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:55 pm
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Location: Lurking Below the Surface...
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Dallas Winston wrote:

And we're probably real close to hearing Scott from Scott's scream FEED YOUR LAWN! Ad nauseaum! SUCK MY COCK!

The Danny Bonaduce-looking Scott for Scotts has indeed returned in TV & radio commercials, even though the weather outside doesn't exactly feel like spring. Bonaduce should smack Scott in the face!

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Terry's Peeps

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 12:47 pm

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 6:05 pm
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SHARK wrote:

Dallas Winston wrote:

And we're probably real close to hearing Scott from Scott's scream FEED YOUR LAWN! Ad nauseaum! SUCK MY COCK!

The Danny Bonaduce-looking Scott for Scotts has indeed returned in TV & radio commercials, even though the weather outside doesn't exactly feel like spring. Bonaduce should smack Scott in the face!

Why are you so violent SHARK?

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SHARK

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 12:52 pm

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:55 pm
Posts: 26000
Location: Lurking Below the Surface...
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Terry's Peeps wrote:

SHARK wrote:

Dallas Winston wrote:

And we're probably real close to hearing Scott from Scott's scream FEED YOUR LAWN! Ad nauseaum! SUCK MY COCK!

The Danny Bonaduce-looking Scott for Scotts has indeed returned in TV & radio commercials, even though the weather outside doesn't exactly feel like spring. Bonaduce should smack Scott in the face!

Why are you so violent SHARK?

It's just the sight of Scott telling us "Feed your lawn...Feed it!" in TV commercials.

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rogers park bryan

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 1:21 pm

Joined: Wed Sep 24, 2008 12:16 pm
Posts: 81625

What is a slipper?

How does it differ from say...a shoe?

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Tad Queasy

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 22, 2013 1:44 pm

Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:50 am
Posts: 11237
Location: Schaumburg
pizza_Place: Palermo's

The Original Kid Cairo wrote:

American Family Insurance with Dream Big performed by a glee club, or Dream Weaver performed by a lounge club singer. Both are awful and automatic station-changers for me.

I could have sworn I recently heard one or two of these without the song at the end.

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SHARK

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 22, 2013 2:02 pm

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:55 pm
Posts: 26000
Location: Lurking Below the Surface...
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Tad Queasy wrote:

The Original Kid Cairo wrote:

American Family Insurance with Dream Big performed by a glee club, or Dream Weaver performed by a lounge club singer. Both are awful and automatic station-changers for me.

I could have sworn I recently heard one or two of these without the song at the end.

They've changed it.

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Zizou

Post subject: Re: Commercials That Make Me Want to Kill, Part Deux

Posted: Fri Mar 22, 2013 6:11 pm

Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2006 6:43 pm
Posts: 3715
Location: The Kingdom of Gene Siegel

I'm getting really fucking tired of commercials on every fucking channel for all these pills for depression, penis problems, incontinence, dieting, etc. You can't say the word "fuck" on television but Americans can be subjected to these advertisements for pills to dope you up and turn you into a mindless zombie or beget some nasty side effect on to your body.

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