Definitely tallest midget.

He's number 3 based on ratings which his ALS judges his worth by.

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I only want to kick his ass 50% of the time. The other 50 Id like to see him boiled alive .

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

I don't care if 100 million people tune in daily to M&H, there's no way in hell anyone can make a convincing argument that that they are better than Bernstein. And I don't really like B&B that much.

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

I don't put my faith in the ratings either.

But I've been bludgeoned with them for 7 months when talking about Bernstein in a positive light.

So based on the criteria of the ALS, the suggestion that Bernstein is the best host in the city is laughable. He's not even the best at his station.

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Based on any type of criteria that statement is laughable.

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

seeing him fired would be the funniest thing i have ever witnessed

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

Other than having the ability to attend "college" in a shuttered Arbys he'd be the best recruiter the Illinois Center for Broadcasting could ever hope for.

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Kenny Williams fell for the banana in the tailpipe

My children almost recognize me on sight now.

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You know me like that.

He was a great Bears beat reporter in the mid-1990s.

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He does a great Vin Scully impression, and his "Vin Scully reading Led Zeppelin lyrics" bit was one of the funniest things I've ever heard on that station.

I thought it was Vin Scully reading NWA lyrics.

Either way it was outstanding.

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He may have done both, but I heard the Zeppelin version.

Imagine Vin Scully saying "I'm gonna give you my love, I'm gonna give you every inch of my love." and "Squeeze me baby, till the juice runs down my leg. The way you squeeze my lemon, I'm gonna fall right out of bed. "

I can't remember which other ones he read, but I was laughing so hard I was crying. That was probably around '98 to '00 or thereabouts.

I heard him do Scully reading "Dopeman" and choked on my food from laughing.

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love him or hate him, the guy can be very funny. He does some good imitations too.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

That's the one I heard as well.

Couldn't stop laughing for a good 5 minutes.

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I picture Scully reading the sexually suggestive ones in his underpants, shirtless, while wearing black dress socks held up with those little sock garters.

Actually, I think about that quite a bit...

I believe "Dopeman, please, can I get another hit" was followed by, like, "Garvey is also looking for another hit."

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"That's the way it goes, that's the name of the game; Young brother getting over by slangin' caine. 3 and 2 to Sax..."

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He breathed fresh air into a fairly stagnate platform, then became a troll and a parity of himself.

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I want that Bernstein back. Alas, he is gone, pushed aside for very.important.radio.

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

He made me a Penn St fan

One half of the best radio show in Chicago.

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Not even best show on it's own station.

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He's still great as his job. Unfortunately, I don't think he is fulfilled by his job any more and needs to stray to super serious topics in order to validate himself as having some greater calling. When he just acts like you expect a local radio host to act there is no one better.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Thank Christ he didn't turn into a parody of himself. That would be fucked up.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Still one of my favorite hosts. I just don't get his need to tell people how to enjoy themselves or have fun. Just lay the fuck off.

When is that? I haven't heard that in a while

He seems like a dedicated father

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

He got me listening to music again while in my car and at home.

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I have heard many professionals say that you need to move from a job about every 10 years to avoid stagnation. We may be seeing this. Eventually the salary becomes a prison because who is going to pay mid six figures anywhere else

My nice thing to say is that dan is fantastic at being an iconoclast and a lone voice in the desert. It sucks when he uses the ability to champion the obvious

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.