The McDonald's commercial where the guy is in line to get into a Lollapalooza-like event but needs to take one last bite of his sandwich before he can get past the stereotypically big and black and mean security guard ("no food beyond this point" sign). The guy with the sandwich is the most unlikable person I've ever seen in a commercial. I don't often do the knee-jerk thing, but I want to hurt that guy every time I see the commercial.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

you could stop right there and i'd agree with you but definitely, most certainly specifically this commercial. the 'one more bite' guy brings my piss to a boil.

i can't stand the way they cast "youths" in commercials because they always go for the most annoying stereotypes. we need a group of just...guys. ok, get two bearded hipsters, get one cool guy, and get a guy with the 5 o'clock shadow with a raspy voice. make sure they have moppy hairdos. we need a beer commercial...get the unattainable brunette along with 2 equally unattainable blonds and stick them with the other scruffy, no-business-having-any-action, douchebags who constantly look like they've just woken up and it's 3 o'clock in the afternoon. and have them all having a great time with each other. that's what we want to see. they represent US!

Those Vonage ads with the homeless hipster and his catchphrase "CRAZY GENEROUS".

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

Here it is. http://vimeo.com/69644577

He's such a douchy chap. I'm pretty sure that's what they were aiming for though. They succeeded.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Who the hell holds a McDonalds breakfast sandwich with two hands? Besides Silvy, of course.

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-- source

Smarrrrt shoppers SHOP!

Is that commercial supposed to be a take-off on Poison's Unskinny Bop, or am I imagining that? I can't tell.

Why does he keep touching the security guard? Is this supposed to be indicative of Ecstasy use?

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

i hate this guy, and whoever his friends are that probably loaded his FB page with "congrats". "Congrats, Eean! We knew you would be a star! LOL! Now hook me up with some of those egg mcmuffins!"

speaking of which, will you accept my friend request already? it's been like months. and my latest status is ranking all 10 of the MST seasons!

Wow. I can't believe I hadn't accepted your request. My bad. Shows how often I go on there. I'll hook ya up.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

cool man, it's no worries. i know how that goes with FB. as we see from the thread in the DBOTW section.

Did you guys notice they replaced Rachel in the Comcast "Working mother of three!" commercial? She doesn't sound as unjustifiably proud to have a job as the last Rachel.

What is it, fucking Office Max that has the "let's get it started" song? Jesus fuck is that song played out. Instant PTFB for me. Fucking black eyed peas. Eat shit and die, office max.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Beat me to it as usual!!! The other one that makes me wanna commit multiple homicides is the don't drive drunk commercial with the sad sack, whiny, cocksucker. "You know what else you don't see.....my girlfriend" Like you'd even have one you whiny prick! You know what else I don't see? You're fucking balls!!!!! STFU you theoretical fucking loser. Don't fucking drive drunk next time cuntswab!!!!!

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I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out. - Bill Hicks

Let's do it for Johnny!

"Why are you trying to one-up me, man? Yeah, you do this all the time."

I feel sorry for the ball-less wonders who recorded this.

Yeah .... I was kinda hoping the brother would beat the reperations outta that skinny white fucker.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

It took me a while to decide what pissed me off so much about that commercial. Here it is: he claims to have lost his girlfriend because she thinks dating someone with "no car and no license is no fun."

What?

That's the complaint? She's not against your drunken driving, but merely against your inability to drive her around? Fucking shit. Aim a little lower, you assfucking commercial. Jesus.


Again with this one. The primary annoying aspect of this commercial is that both of the assholes voice it in an irritating, bitchy manner; any regular person would instinctively hope that both guys had died of a horrible disease, and suffered greatly.

But there's something more going on here.

After some thought, I deduced that the premise is idiotic. The one guy's car has all these faggy options, but he's pissed at the other bitch for having such-and-such insurance. But it's insurance. The first asshole could easily insure his faggy ride with the second guy's faggy insurance.

That is, unless the commercial is trying to say that their insurance is too expensive. It's almost as if they're trying to tell you that their insurance is a more costly product that a car with millions of needless and faggy accessories.

Bottom line: whoever wrote this commercial is a fucking moron. They should all die of penis or ovarian cancer, whichever is appropriate.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

MitC does yeoman's work in this thread.

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I take this extremely seriously. When I'm dead and gone, I hope to be remembered as a titan of bitching about commercials, if not things in general.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Aaron Rodgers with the original Superfans on the airplane....'nuff said.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

Someone needs to call into B&B and rave about this ad. Something tells me they despise it.

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-- source

Somebody should just ask them (Dan) what they don't despise,much shorter list.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

Black people beating each other up for his Sunday afternoon amusement
The Bulls
The Sox
Studs
Darren Rovell
Camp
Twitter
Food Network hosts who aren't Paula Deen
His social betters

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why does an 8 year old charlie korsmo look alike need to google how to ask out a girl? first get rid of those braces, genius.

There's a commercial for some BlahBlah365 computer bullshit that ominously lists places that "your kid might be doing it"- Homework, that is. Funny. First place on the list- the back seat of a '59 Camaro. Pretty fucking hard to do WHEN THE CAMARO WAS FIRST INTRODUCED IN 1967!!. Research FAIL, you hipster adman.

Holy shit! This thread is getting results!

So, I was listening yesterday afternoon, and I was well out of button-punch range, and the commercial starts up "meet Rachel, mother of three." My black, black heart trebled in size, anticipating the inevitable "working mother of three," and it came -BUT!- the voice was changed! They have the same commercial, with, I think, all the same lines, but they ditched the annoying bitch playing the "Rachel" part for a much less annoying bitch.

Evidently, negative feedback was so overwhelming, that Comcast felt the need to re-cut the commercial with a different actress.

Fuck yeah. Hopefully this causes the old "Rachel" to be unable to find future work, and her life goes to hell, and she turns to drugs and contracts aids from an intravenous needle and dies friendless and destitute, and is buried by the state in a pauper's grave, where she's forgotten, and it's like she never existed.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

viewtopic.php?f=60&t=59678&start=1075#p1806213

You even posted right after it about something else.

TOE-STUHH STROOOOO-DULLLLLLLLL

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

So bad.

It's about as cringeworthy as the Billy Goat still being proud to have been a SNL sketch over 30 years ago that no one outside of Chicago even remembers.

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-- source

What in the bleeding hell is this "we solve for x" crap? Does it make the slightest bit of sense? I have no idea of the context, as I have happily evolved to actively not-listen to life's abomination known as commercials. But this "we solve for x" line somehow grabs my attention, and wow, is that dumb. You want to solve something, how about solving how to get your ad-copy writer's head out from being stuffed three feet deep up his butthole?