take a good look at this guy and tell me the first word/phrase pops into your mind upon seeing his magnanimous visage..
for me "pays for sex" comes to mind. this right here is PURPORTEDLY (remember, there never was a garpax. we never were at war with eurasia. bernstein Knows) the brain trust of YOUR chicago bulls, and i'm sorry to say that i'm a shallow Caller Bob who can look at somebody and immediately judge them as someone whom i have no use for in my life; gar forman is one of those people.
the bulls aren't going to do shit until they get a #1 scoring option because as i've been saying since the middle of the 2010 MVP campaign
DERRICK ROSE CANNOT BE THE LEADING SCORER ON A CHAMPIONSHIP CONTENDER. it's that simple. when derrick is forced to be "the guy" aka "oh fuck we're completely unable to do anything on offense so let's give the ball to derrick and pray" which is roughly 66-75% of the bulls offense on any given night, he's going to be a volume chucker and hey NEWS FLASH!!!!! derrick's body isn't able to withstand the rigors of a full "the man" NBA workload for an 82 game season + playoffs, as is evidenced by his numerous breakdowns over the years.
and don't take this the wrong way, one thing derrick rose has that you can't take away from him is heart. i know taht aspect of his psyche has taken a hit as many thought he's been sandbagging it in his multiple major recoveries and he could have been back a lot sooner.... but i'm talking about the overall heart inside this kid to go out there and literally SUPER-TRYHARD his ass off until his body literally fails him and his knees explode. he'd be out there hearkening fond memories of allen iverson going full blast into a lane chock full of large black wangwhippers who are going to kick his ass and send him to the ground with a resounding thud, and even after that happened 3-6 times a game he'd be ready to go out there and do it for the 7th time if that's what the team needed him to do.
when the heat put lebron on derrick and effectively ended the bulls "thing" in 2010-11 or whatever it was, derrick didn't go out of his way to say the obvious "once they locked me down nobody else could do shit" observation.... he stepped up and said that it was all his fault that the bulls lost to the heat. he missed way too many shots and when his team absolutely needed him to be 100% of the offense that just so happened to be guarded by the best defender in the NBA (even if he isn't, bernstein would say that he is, and bernstein is on the score for a reason, and hey wait a minute what do YOU do for a living, eh? eh? shut up and listen more closely you might learn something. signed: amattacola) and therefore derrick had no recourse because if he didnt attempt to volume shoot in the heat series the bulls were prolly even more fucked than they were and swept 4-0 as opposed to getting the token early game where the heat learned they had to shut down derrick with lebron.
so yeah derrick has proven to me that he'll go fullspeed face first into a brick wall ad infinitum until he dies from cerebral hemorrhaging if that's what the bulls need, so i don't question his commitment. what i do question is this notion that derrick can be the #1 scoring option on a team that fancies itself a champinship contender. he just can't be that when his body is aging way too quickly and entering a breakdown phase at/before age 25 and therefore if you look his FG% has gone down to the point where during #TheReturn he was basically shooting 33% out there. "thatsa no good" as they say in the old country.
so yeah yadda yadda yadda TL;DR/semi-tangential crap cuz this thread is about the moves the bulls DO make as opposed to my opining on the state of the bulls as a whole, but i just wanna say that until the bulls get a legit #1 scoring option that isn't derrick rose (hell, if you wanna contend for titles have 2 guys who you can count on to get 20 b4 derrick) all the rest of these moves are swapping deck chairs on the titanic (or whatever the proper idiom is) YOU. ARE. NOT. GETTING. CLOSER. TO. A CHAMPIONSHIP. instead you're invariably gonna get another bunch of dirt-cheap/scrap-heap underachievers who maybe have a lil jumper or some marginal offensive ability along with a pedigree of hustling and playing defense (whch is why they're still in/around the league despite their glaring lack of offensive firepower) who that pimp* thibodeau can take under his wing, coach the hell out of them and teach them to play BIG. BOY. DEFENSE.... and then he'll use them in situations that maximize their marginal ability and show the rest of the league what a good coach can do with that cheap asset, which is a great showcase when these scrap heap guys turn around and go and get $3-5mil/yr elsewhere so they can go off and star in taco bell comercials like nate robinson.
* = i call thibodeau a pimp cuz he takes bum players and gets em made paid and laid. you gonna tell me that ppl like nate robinson ain't up to their forehead in grade-A cooch with their newfound millions of dollars? yeah they're already NBA players so they're doing quite well as it is, but when you go from a fringe bottom of the barrel signing to $5mil deal and taco bell commercials, the bitches will take notice. and that pussy you're now enjoying is largely thanks to the man the myth, the legend that is THE PIMP, tom thibodeau. he gets the job done.
i still gotta get around to actually writing for my bulls blog called "thibodeau's fleshlight: an intimate bulls blog" #CestLaVie
_________________
Curious Hair wrote:
Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?
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I like how Rose isn't included. I would take Stephenson and Love too.
