The Bulls head up to Milwaukee to take on the Bucks in what I'm sure will be another low-effort performance that will shame the city of Chicago and have the Bulls risk missing the playoffs altogether. Maybe if Joakim Noah didn't stick his dick in everything that moved, these guys would play hard for each other once in a while.

The Bucks are exceeding expectations in both wins and attendance. Milwaukee is clearly not a true basketball market and this team should be moved to a place where real fans will appreciate their game, like Seattle, Raleigh, or Rucker Park. In the meantime, however, the NBA is dead-set on making Milwaukee work, and we'll have to overcome a great deal of biased officiating. I bet they're even going to automatically win the draft lottery.

But things may be looking up, as the team has found an unlikely ally in loathsome Kochhead Scott Walker, possibly the only man who can somehow be described as having a shit-eating thousand-yard stare. Walker's love for corporate welfare has, at least for the time being, outstripped his hatred for black people and things they might like, leading Walker to make the generous offer of paying for the arena with the working class's money. You can presume that no union labor will be involved in the construction of this arena, so I won't be surprised when a poorly installed light fixture comes crashing down on Jason Kidd's head and kills him. On second thought, maybe this ain't so bad.

Let's take a look at some stats no one cares about.

Bulls: actual record 45-29, adjusted for inflation 45-29
Bucks: actual record 36-38, adjusted for inflation 36-38

Bulls: 26th in the league in wang-whipping studs (Butler), 1st in the league in White Basketball (Gasol, McDermott, Mirotic, Hinrich, Dunleavy, half of Noah, Thibs, Pax)
Bucks: 5th in the league in funny mascots, 1st in the league in representing Lake Michigan

Bulls: numbers don't even matter for this team right now because they're going to fire Tom Thibodeau for not appreciating that Jerry Reinsdorf gave him a job
Bucks: numbers don't even matter for this team right now because they're the Milwaukee Bucks

Today felt like a good day to give this a try. Go Bulls!

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ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz is derrick back yet?

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

Interesting post, Hair. However, the Bulls will crush the Bucks tonight. We're not clicking on all cylinders right now, but they're worse.

post of the year nominee right here. this thing is just seething with venom coming out of every orifice, nobody was safe or exempt from CH's spraying to all fields like he's breaking the seal on beer #13

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Umm....it's April 1st.

Holy Fuck he's doing this for the fucking Bulls

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I'm going to bounce from the spot for awhile but I will be back at some point to argue with you about this hoops stuff again. Playoffs have been great this season. See ya up the road.

I'm out.