I'm sure you heard about it. Mayor Daley is giving the commencement speech at Northwestern's graduation ceremony.


So they wanted the Dali Lama? I'm laughing my ass off over that one. Doesn't the Dali Lama have this whole Tibetian liberation thing going on? Why would he want to come to your graduation?
Here's a few stupid things said in todays Tribune:

Well, Simon, maybe if your football team wasn's such a joke they could have gotten you that free money Matthew Losko guy. International profile , come on man, a little perspective here.

right, Matthew. 4 plus years of schooling, and they want you to be happy leaving, so as a going away present after spending nearly 120k on tuition and associated costs they wish to piss you off.
I am surprised at the lack of maturity from the NW grads. At least these coupla goofballs.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I think I would be disappointed at this too.

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Paws Up

They should have stuck with a theme and gotten Maury.

Mike North might be available if they're willing to rename a building in his name. C'mon Bebe, get on it!

I think the speech should have been given by our very own Tall Midget.

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Then MITC could give his take on religion, which would undoubtedly take up the entire ceremony.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

They should cry a river of tears to their law school comrades, whose commencement speaker this year was... Jerry Springer!

Do people really care that much about their speaker? I never gave it a thought. I'm not even sure who it was but I'm almost positive it was Jesse Jackson. I didn't go. I just went to my individual college graduation not the general one. I don't know who spoke at my college one.

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You know me like that.

I voted for the first option because I read it like Ron Santo would say it.

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I've read the story on my way to work this morning and was going to do the nomination. Good to see Darko get there first. What a bunch of whiny brats!

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"It's not exactly a rocket surgery." D.J.

I can just see it, a sweaty Richie stammering and stuttering incoherently with his press sec'y behind him and to the right trying to prod him back in the right direction (only to have to translate his remarks once he finished)

The NW kids are right.

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

Maybe we can get beardown to give a "How would Rich Daley sound?" post brewing...

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Will he tell them they wasted money because the way to get ahead is to have powerful friends and family?

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Paws Up

No, he'll tell their parents that. (as in, "if youse fammiillies out dere had donated dat too-i-tion paper to my regular Democratic or-gan-i-za-shun, your kids could have been workin' for me and mine yearz ago")

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

I'm so conflicted here.
The quoted graduates are indeed whiny little shits. I can't remember who spoke at my graduation, nor did I care.
Daley is swine and needs to be voted out of office asap.
I do indeed have a belly button. I haven't seen it in many, MANY years, but I feel confident it's still there.

What to do, what to do...

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Stupidity irritates the crap outta me... and yes, I irritate myself far too often.

Unfortunately, because my graduation was held outdoors in sweltering 97 degree heat, and because the commencement speaker felt that since she had just made a seven figure donation to the school she should get her full half hour speech in, I do remember, but didn't care.

Oprah felt all of her sweaty nuggets of wisdom had to touch our ears.

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

I'm trying to imagine what a sweaty nugget of wisdom looks like.

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Stupidity irritates the crap outta me... and yes, I irritate myself far too often.

From Oprah, melting lard. (She was even oblivious to the people passing out in the crowd - though for some it was alcohol related)

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

Anybody else find it ironic that Daley is more powerful than either of these politicians and that one has already had to kiss the ring in order to have a shot at the presidency?

Did they try to get mike north to speak? I mean he is a big fish in chicago

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Get out of here, Darko! Who wants to sit for "tree hours" listening to King Richard butcher the English language? Come to think of it, that might be amusing.

If I had my way I'd get Matt Damon and lead into the ceremony with the epic line "you just pissed away 120K in tuition that you could have gotten for 50 cents in late fees at the public library."

Douches

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"Stay out of courtrooms-but if you must go in be Well Armed and Don't compromise. You are innocent, remember that. They are guilty" -- Dr. Gonzo

I'm not sure what is more ridiculous: 1) That some college students actually care about the commencement speaker; 2) That the college president responded to one of their emails in such a snarky way. (Love that word Bagels); or 3) That this trivial issue deserves any kind of douchebag nomination. But if it does deserve a douchebag nomination, I'd probably nominate both the kids and the President for not having more important things to spend their time on.

For example, I wonder how many of these kids actually have jobs. Maybe if they had real JOBs to worry about or spent their time trying to find one, maybe they wouldn't care so much or have time to worry about a freaking graduation speaker.

Come on Coast. That's what this section is all about.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

That's exactly right my friend. It certainly is. Actually, I love what you're doing with this section. My week is not complete until I've had the weekly recap of D-bags.

Even worse Coast, it was a piece during the opening segment on local news broadcasts.

I liked it better when Frank Drebin was doing it.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

D'Bag o' the week?

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Paws Up

I think BD's political tidbits would also fill that need.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!