This team IS cursed. I don't mean some fantastical metaphysical, tourist trap contrivance centered around a goat.

I mean they are cursed by the fact that no group of half-ass, late-night partying, over-the-hill drunken dumbasses have even lucked their way into a championship in 100 years. I mean every other stinking franchise in America and one in Canada at least got lucky one year and stumbled into something.

So, that leaves this franchise, paralyzed by a set of circumstances that no player's psyche seems capable of handling. There is no other explanation for continual failure to show up in the playoffs by different sets of guys in different years against substandard competition. Grace is about the only player who ever has shown up in the playoffs. Everybody else sucks. Last night's game was an embarrassment and that dumbass on the M&H show blaming Cubs fans can blow me. That game sucked. They've won one freakin' series in 100 years. They have a right to sit on their hands until those sleepwalkers give them a reason to slap those hands together. I didn't see it last night.

If they don't win the World Series this year, I might be done with this franchise. I'm not even sure winning a World Series is worth this at this point. Watching 35 years of mind-numbing games like last night, year after year playing playoff games with your eyes staring directly into the headlights and having to watch the whole funeral play out is getting to be a bit much.

It's like the MLB version of Fear Factor. Sure, those dim bulbs won $50,000. But they had to eat a cow uterus. Was the $50k really worth vomiting up a cow uterus?

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You know me like that.

That's how I was at about 8:00 last night. I feel better now though. I may be back on that ledge though soon.

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Fire Phil Emery

There's been bad breaks for the Cubs, but last nite was just bad baseball plain and simple. Had nothing to do with some silly witchcraft or curse.

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The curse of pressure, Frank.

I don't believe in witchcraft. Perhaps I was not clear.

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You know me like that.

Last night was poor pitching. Sorry you give up 9 walks, you lose. It happens during the season and can happen in the post season. If the same thing happens tonight, I will be shocked.

Pressure is having 230 people in a bar in the bottom of the 9th and not being able to serve booze.

Maybe the Cubs are helping in that regard

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So why last night? Why always in the playoffs? Because these guys cannot handle the pressure. It was horrible baseball.

The Cubs won 68% of their home games. That team won 80% of Dempster's Wrigley starts. Dempster walked 7 guys IN SEPTEMBER and then 7 last night.

They choke. They always choke. They all choke. Choke.

I was just explaining my reasoning behind the continual choke job. Excuse my apparently unclever choice of comparing it to the fabled "Curse".

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You know me like that.

I am by no means "warm & fuzzy" about losing last night...and frankly am PISSED OFF.

That said...IF...and I say IF the Cubs win tonight....there is no reason not to think we cannot win a game or two in LA...and it may very well boil down to a game 5 back here in Wrigley. Tonights game is crucial...but this series is by no means, over.

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Proud to be UNVERIFIED.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!! Why will you be shocked?! Don't you know who's pitching tonight? Of course it's going to happen again. They'll lose in 3...

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

Alright. I feel better getting that off my chest.

Cubs in 4.

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You know me like that.

STOP!! You're just setting yourself up again for failure. The sooner you accept the inevitable, the sooner the healing can begin...

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

Yes I know who is pitching. I also know he is pitching on 7 days rest. It will be cold and sucky. I think Zambrano will be fine. Like I said I would be shocked if he came out and pitched as poorly as Dempster did last night.

CoF + PANIC!!! = MATCH!

I can't stop now. I've already eaten most of the cow uterus, vomited a portion back up and re-eaten it.

I might as well finish the rest and collect the check.

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You know me like that.

You can come over to the dark side. We are eating filet for a late lunch.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I do look like PANIC with all those caps and !!'s, but I'm just being realistic...I thought at some point either PANIC or RELAX would end up being right...looks like PANIC won out...

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

I do believe in WarCraft, though.

reading is FUNdimental, Frank...

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

Just so I can get the visual straight - are you the token hot chick on Fear Factor with the big boobs that always manages to make it to the final round, simply for the purposes of titilation? Or are you the muscle bound tough-guy jock that ends up winning the damn thing, even though you have the hardest time eating the uterus?

I'l hang up and listen for my answer.

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Curses, foiled again!

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

Doc is right. You'd think they'd have a team that would just get hot in the playoffs and win it in 100 years. Stumble to it as Doc put it. That's what I thought about the Sox after 87 years. Then they got one finally.

The "curse" is, indeed, the way that Doc described it. Pressure. Above and beyond the normal pressure of trying to win. Players deny it. Say it doesn't matter. But they think about that 100 year thing. In 1984 they thought about the 75 year thing. And every team in between. I'm sure of it.

Now, that doesn't explain why the 1945 team lost in the World Series. Hadn't been that long of a drought at that point. And the teams to that point since 1908. The streak didn't start weighing on players mind until it reached 50 years IMO.

Goddammit, I WAS shocked , that Dempster was that bad. No fucking reason for it unless the gremlins of Cubs past were whispering their sweet nothings in Dempster's ears. Dempster was wound tighter than a top and didn't get it out of his system all night.

What possible reason could we have to think that Zambrano, of all people, will have an easier time of dealing with the pressure tonight?

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Stupidity irritates the crap outta me... and yes, I irritate myself far too often.

Everyone, you are all getting worried for nothing. We are going to look back on last night and today and laugh. Zambrano is going to be fine. He is a hell of a pitcher, that kid. He won't let us down. He is a money pitcher, and will for certain show us all why he makes the big bucks.

The lineup is looking real good for tonight. I am feeling as though there will be an eruption tonight, perhaps 12-14 runs. The Dodgers frankly aren't that good. Derreck Lee looks like he is finding his power stroke again, and tonight I bet he really unleashes his inner beast and belts a couple. Soriano lloked as though he was a bit under the weather last night, I am sure he will be fine tonight.

As Lou correctly stated last night, it was game 1. There is a reason they don't play 1 game series, because freak things like last night can happen. The dodgers cant match the depth in the rotation the Cubs have. There is really very little to worry about, except arranging the lineup properly for Philly.

Relax. Relax. Relax.

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RELAX.
EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK.
TAKE A DEEP BREATH.
GO TO YOUR HAPPY PLACE.
ALL IS WELL.

I think they should play 7 game series in the 1st round. That's a better indication of the best team I think.

At this point, I think the Chicago teams need 21 game series.

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If you're trying to say we both suck, Spanky, then you're saying it the wrong way. A 21 game series would certainly eliminate the worst team.

Not saying either"suck" - just saying neither team looks likely to win a short series. At this point, the longer the better....

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Would you still say that if the Sox won the 1st game?

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

So I was right I would be shocked if the same thing happened, instead it was the fielders who didn't show up.

I was going to start my own sad sap thread, but Ken already did, so I'll just pile on.

I’ve been watching sports for literally as long as I can remember; my first memory, so far as I can tell, is watching the 1989 NLCS and vaguely knowing what was going on, but knowing that is wasn’t good.

Not much stuck beyond that however. My first really clear sports memory was watching the 1993 (1992 season) Cotton Bowl, where Notre Dame beat Texas A&M. I always think that it’s a little but unfair when kids grow up learning to cheer for dominant teams, like the people my age who claim to have been Yankees, Bulls, and Cowboys fans, but I had a valid excuse with Notre Dame: my grandfather, who was really the only sports fan in my family, was a Notre Dame fan and so I learned to take after him (I have no idea why he was.) I’m pretty sure I watched every game that was televised that year; I know I saw them beat USC and Pittsburgh, although neither game was memorable. I also, of course, remember the Florida State game, the so-called “Game of the Century.” Of course, it was not to be, and Notre Dame lost what I had just assumed was a technicality game against Boston College. Florida State, for some reason, was allowed to play for the national championship. Notre Dame, once again, defeated Texas A&M in the Cotton Bowl, although I don’t remember that one. Notre Dame had some success thereafter, but nothing close to the 1993 season. Since that second Cotton Bowl (January 1st, 1994), they haven’t won another bowl game. I was in 2nd grade during that season. I graduated from college last year.

Baseball hasn’t been better, of course, but it’s even worse when you think about it. The Cubs were promptly swept in the 1998 NLDS against Atlanta, the last time we’d see Kerry Wood fully healthy and dominant until 2003. I needn’t go into that 2003 season much. Everyone predicted the Cubs would win the championship in 2004; they missed the playoffs, losing their top two starters. In the meantime, the following teams won the World Series:

2003: Marlins, who ripped the heart from my body
2004: The Sawx and their legion of annoying fans
2005: White Sox, which meant that the Cubs would forever lose all “bragging” rights.
2006: Cardinals, the most awful franchise on the face of the Earth
2007: The Sawx and their legion of annoying fans

It’s been the same everywhere else as well. The Bears made the playoffs in 1994, beat Minnesota, and then was outclassed by a vastly superior 49ers team. Then, years of Wannstedt-induced suckage until 2001, where the Bears went 11-5, received a bye, and promptly lost to a superior Eagles team. Repeat pattern, replacing Jauron for Wannstedt, and then the Panthers for the Eagles in 2005. Then 2006, the Super Bowl run, the 13-3 season… all ending by getting outclassed by the Colts in the Super Bowl. There’s nothing by mediocrity in sight there.

Even the peripheral sports have sucked, or played their seasons in precisely the correct manner to maximize emotional damage. The Illinois basketball team losing in the 2005 national championship game. Illinois getting curb-stomped by USC in the Rose Bowl last year. Northwestern getting curb-stomped by USC in the Rose Bowl in 1995. Various and multiple losses to the Red Wings and Avalanche back when I cared about hockey. (Before anyone brings up the Bulls, I’ve never cared about the NBA).

And so I think I’ve reached the realization that it’s not the Cubs that are cursed. Sure, they hadn’t had much success before I was born either, but that’s just a coincidence. It’s me who’s cursed. I’m the problem. Every team I have a rooting interest in has alternated between awful and tantalizingly good, only to kill me over and over and over and over again. And that's how it's going to be, until I'm dead.

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Fire Phil Emery