I thought the last one was good. I would have swapped he for she.

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Nas: Blago, who has single handedly destroyed CFMB?

Blago: https://youtube.com/shorts/Lftdxd-YXt8?feature=share


“We cannot turn away from this truth in this election, putting patriotism ahead of partisanship is not an aspiration —it is our duty.” -Liz Cheney

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It's not a question of funny, it's a dad joke so...ah nevermind.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

It was corny enough too.

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Nas: Blago, who has single handedly destroyed CFMB?

Blago: https://youtube.com/shorts/Lftdxd-YXt8?feature=share


“We cannot turn away from this truth in this election, putting patriotism ahead of partisanship is not an aspiration —it is our duty.” -Liz Cheney

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How do you get condensed milk?


From a dwarf cow.

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Once I was kidnapped by mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

_________________
Nas: Blago, who has single handedly destroyed CFMB?

Blago: https://youtube.com/shorts/Lftdxd-YXt8?feature=share


“We cannot turn away from this truth in this election, putting patriotism ahead of partisanship is not an aspiration —it is our duty.” -Liz Cheney

I don't get it

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

Rabbi vs Rabbit.

You'd think the rabbit would have ducked.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

How come there are no good jokes about Jim Jones?

The punchlines are too long

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An unjust law is no law at all--St. Augustine of Hippo

Cause tried and true
I see the light in you
Oh, can you dig in my soul?
Could you smell my whole...
life?--Gener and Deaner

I wonder how many on the board are old enough to remember that.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

Oh yeah? Challenge accepted.
You like boxing? Who's has the best punch ever? Your prey will say Ali or Tyson or something like that.
Nope. Jim Jones. Killed over 900 with one punch.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

By the way I missed tge joke but got it later.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

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mmmm... Flavor-aid.

I was just a wee lad at the time time but I find it hard to believe any adult hasn't heard about Jonestown.

Yesterday my wife asked me if she was the only one I've slept with. I said yes, the rest were 9s and 10s.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

My wife asked me if I had seen the dog bowl.

I said, "I didn't know he could".

My son asked me, "Do trees poop?

I said, "Where do you think #2 pencils come from?"

Why did the physics teacher and the biology teacher break up?

There was no chemistry.

What's the German word for Constipation?

Farfrompoopen.

What does the polygamist hippie call his wives?



One Mrs. Hippie, two Mrs. Hippie, three Mrs. Hippie……

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If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

that one is quintessential dad joke

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

Awesome!

Loganlisle and coachsaysjokes on Instagram is where I got this one and the three others.

So my niece Ashley is in 3rd grade and she laughs sometimes about this kid Duncan in her class because he "talks funny" (he's from Scotland...). Every day they do vocabulary where they pick a word and randomly point to three kids and have them say the word and use it in a sentence. Yesterday's word was "contagious". Teacher points to one kid and she says "contagious... my daddy's laugh is contagious, when he laughs everyone laughs". Teacher points to Ashley and she says "contagious... I had a cold last week and my mom says I couldn't go to school because I was contagious". Teacher says "very good, your turn Duncan" Duncan says "me daddy and I was driving down the road and we see an old lady painting a picket fence that had to be a kilometer long. He said it'll take that contagious to paint that fence there."

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

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If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.