i wanna point out that this thread is no less than 66% funnier when you have the mental image of jason goff Himself actually having the baby.... you know, some sort of arnold schwarzenegger in "junior" type deal =P

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One would assume Goff gets off the entire week. Men get Maternity leave now a days. I wouldn't get it if "Girl Chained to my Furnace" had a baby. Not fair.

I took two weeks off when little rsg was born. Glorious.

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-- source

Remember when Grimace took like a month off and then his kid ended up somehow eating his own shit. I think I took a few days off and neither of the UMN's have eaten or even tried to eat their own shit.

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That's my purse! I don't know you!

Well it was either that or listen to the show. Ruben made the right choice.

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

Congrats Goff. Take as much paternity leave as you can!

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Ellsworth Jason Goff II

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You can take the time, you just don't get paid for it.

Gotta feed the kids, Chicago!

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

No one ever had a baby and said "Man, I really miss the money I would have made for the time I took off when they were born!".

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Spiegs just said, Baby Goff's name is "Jace".

Oh. I am certain that there are many people who have felt that or simply could not afford to.

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Why are only 14 percent of black CPS 11th-graders proficient in English?

You think there are people that took time off and would rather have a weeks salary over a week with their newborn?

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Is this even serious ? You bet your ass there are. Not everyone is exactly overjoyed over becoming a parent.

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

Those people wouldn't have taken a week off without pay to be with the baby.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Yes. Some people really need the weeks salary to help pay for the newborn or other kids they may have.

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If it is that dire they didn't take that time off so it isn't relevant to my point.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Argument has already been done at least once and probably more at this site. Just link to it and save the space.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

When's the wedding? Did Mrs. Bernstein get the gig?

Goff couldn't afford her.

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Beardown: Jason, please, for the love of God, don't try to get your son's first words to be "DUMB ASS CRACKER".

Goff:

Beardown: Son of a bitch. That's what I thought. You're gonna do it, aren't you? Well, ya know, on second thought, those should be the first words of your son. It's only fitting. So, on behalf of white people, we're cool with it. We suck.