The two shows are spending a week in Arizona at a resort. They're all together. This is GD's idea.

Fixed

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Sherman remarked, "Well, Grant, we've had the devil's own day, haven't we?" Grant looked up. "Yes," he replied, followed by a puff. "Yes. Lick 'em tomorrow, though."

I think I've got a better idea, Good dolphin.

Parkins and Mac chip in to get a hooker.

Look, they don't have to bang her. Unless they want to. What the hell do I care. But pay her the rate she requires just to hang out at the resort. Tell her all they want from her is to have her drink and do cocaine. Maybe a lap dance or two. Bernstein will want no part of this. This would be beneath him, obviously.

Parkins: Hey Bernstein, come out of your room and hang out with us and the hooker.

Bernstein: No thanks, guys. I'll just be in my room drinking red wine and doing puzzles.

Once Bernstein is passed out drunk after 2 bottles of wine you go to the hooker with a request. Parkins gives her an extra $100 to lay down next to Bernstein naked. They take a picture. Then they show Bernstein the picture the next day. Bernstein would go nuts. Make them delete it. Which they would. But he would never know if they saved it some where else. So it would haunt him for the rest of his life. Knowing that picture might get out to the public. For a kicker, Parkins and Mac should tell him that the hooker was Catholic. That would make it sting more.

I highly doubt Bernstein will willingly stay in the same location as the plebes - even if this dust-up had never occurred.

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I like thinking big. . . If you're going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big.
-Donald J. Trump, BPE

No. They said they're all staying in the same resort house.

Any other ideas? I think it's gonna be tough to top mine.

No revenge. Just get fucked-up, have a good time and get Bernstein to realize what its like to have friends and to be good to the people you are around every day.

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I like thinking big. . . If you're going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big.
-Donald J. Trump, BPE

It sure would be difficult to top you for being a complete idiot.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

No. We're gonna get our revenge for Mac.

Hey Parkins, Mac isn't gonna do it. It's up to you. You're still living the frat boy lifestyle. So this is right up you alley. Do the "Hooker thing" like I explained.

The key is not to tell Zawaski or McDoink. They're on the other team. They'll tip off Bernstein. You can tell Shep. He's pretty much a 13 year old so he'll think it's cool.

Maybe try to convince Doink and the Pollack (I'm half Polish, I'm allowed) to hit the casino or a movie that night. If not just say you're getting a hooker. Not for sex just for some lap dances and to drink and do drugs. Cuz you're cool like that. Doink and Zawaski will probably want to get the hell out just knowing that. Doink is straight laced. And Zawaski is scared of his wife. So they'll leave just cuz of that. They won't want any part of it. Don't tell Bernstein. Once he sees the hooker he'll run to his room with two bottles of wine like I said and do a crossword puzzle. I don't know what Mac will do. He might be cool with talking to a hooker and getting a few lap dances. Or maybe he'll run off with Zawaski and Doink. Who knows?

If you do it Parkins, I'll buy you a bag of weed.

It's the best way to get even. It will torture Bernstein for the rest of his life knowing that the picture might hit the internet.

Dumb fucking, small-minded idea.

The best revenge is living well - always.

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I like thinking big. . . If you're going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big.
-Donald J. Trump, BPE

Awww. Isn't that sweet.

We're talking about SCORE people. That common sense approach doesn't apply to them.

They're nut jobs.

Would I do what I suggested? No. But I'm not an insane radio guy.

It's always been funny to me. Where the radio people would always say message board people are weirdos. Look at the SCORE people over the years. They're the fuckin' weirdos. They're the fuckin' scum bags. Always have been.

You see the way they behave. It really is amazing.

This

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Go Cubs!!!!

I got confirmation that Mac got a kick about my idea from a source. He liked it. But it won't be done.

So I win. It really was a great idea. I'm good at this shit.

Doesn't help me with getting white women, though. That sucks.

But you know what? I'll finally give my self some credit. It's white woemen's loss that they don't like me. They're all gonna marry assholes. I would have been better for them. They would have had more fun with me.

I had a chance to listen to quite a bit yesterday between 3-5 which is unusual for me. I actually enjoyed the three man weave with Spiegs. A lot of laughing and I had a few chuckles myself. Not sure if they do that occasionally bug I liked it. Music talk kind of muted Parkins a bit but I think it's ok when he has to sit on the sidelines a while when out of his element. I say this liking Parkins for the most part.

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Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami

Bernstein is going to be the lone Felix Unger in a house filled with Oscar Madisons.

The stories that will trickle out of all of this will be priceless. It my take weeks, months or even years but they will eventually be told and worth the wait.

In my experience with situations like this, the guy who you least expect to shine is the one who steals the spotlight and shows his arse.

Stay tuned... this is gonna be great.

"Score House!"

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"This is Chicago, my friend. Anything can happen."

They certainly had some fun making fun of Bernstein and talking about taking lots of pictures.

#scorehouse

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Has anyone mentioned Mac's masturbation contest that he brought up during Transition? That is fucking weird and creepy with a lot of gay overtures.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

Did it give you the tingles?

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Just curious, Beardown: Why do you always specify WHITE women when discussing your woes with the fairer sex? Does this mean that you have success with women of color? If so, why do you think you turn off white women exclusively?